(n, v.) The act of committing an undertaking in the public eye that serves to bring irreparable damage (crack) to one's reputation, intense ridicule and overwhelming embarrassment. Tell tale signs that one has committed a humpty and knows it (or has been informed by PR) include:
-appearing on every day-time and late-night talk show with nothing to promote except not being hated by the public
- your name becomes a verb
-the overwhelming hatred and ridicule for you is so strong that you become the common enemy that unites two or more groups with previously irreconcilable differences
V, past tense - Did you see Tom Cruise on Oprah? Wow, he really pulled a Humpty when he jumped on the couch like an idiot.
by TheHumpties January 24, 2006
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Someone who falls too quick and gets their heart broken every time.
Lindsay: Damn humpty only knew me 5 days and fell in love already.

Kayla: Stage 5 clinger for sure!
by LMKSrfass December 20, 2018
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disgraced by inebriation, embarassingly drunk, negatively affected by the consumption of alcohol (etymology; humpty-dumpty: "humpty dumpty sat on a wall, humpty dumpty had a great fall, all the kings' horses and all the king's men, couldn't put humpty together again---")
"Like yo, she drank a whole fifth of vodka and got humptied fallin' down the stairs!"

"I got humptied last night, pukin' all over the floor and fallin' on people."
by Spike Endpiece December 31, 2008
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1. Noun-the state of being like Humpty Hump
2. Noun-greatness
Peace and Humptiness forever
by gerardiswiggidywack July 25, 2004
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When you set down your glass piece in a stupid way and it falls over and cracks
"I put the bowl into my oil rig to see if it would work and set it down for one second and it immediately tipped over and humptied."
by Pozoe June 5, 2015
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Eat at Soviet Humpty's, help break the chains of capitalist oppresion.
At Soviet Humpty's names are benign.
by Comrade October 13, 2004
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When a tornado is so strong that an egg is capable of being shot through a brick wall. Mentioned by Dale Gribble in the 'King of the Hill' television show
"man, the weather girl says we gonna see some mad tornadoes tonight! I'm talkin' Humpty's Revenge an' shit."
by OnewithaTree May 29, 2012
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