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1. hessian
1: n. Germanic warlord/mercenary from 1500-1700 A.D.

2: adj. pertaining to Germanic warlord/mercenary from 1500-1700 A.D. barbaric.

3: n. An unclean individual who attempts to portray himself as hypermasculine. Predominant in 1980s U.S.A. Common traits include dirty mullet hairstyle, pathetic facial hair, tight fitting acid-washed jeans, black vintage metal tee (cut-off sleeves optional), and "ticking-timebomb" demeanor. Hobbies include stealing bikes, metal, and whoopin' ass. A hesher.

4: adj. of or pertaining to a hesher.
1: The hessians helped the British fight against the U.S. during the Revolutionary War.

2: In a hessian manner, the savage devoured his meal in under sixty seconds.

3: Don't mess with that hessian. He'll go apeshit and gnash his tooth.

4: He released his hessian aggression not through stomping a mudhole in your ass, but by shredding a badass guitar solo even Dave Mustaine would envy.
by Joe Wise Feb 26, 2004 share this
2. Hessian
That guy at the show who shouts "Slayer" repeatedly, holds a beer in one hand in the pit, and takes off his shirt fifteen minutes into the first band's set.
I wanted to go to the Dying Fetus show but quickly decided against it because I knew that there would be too many Hessians there.
3. hessian
A grungy, if not outright dirty metalhead who wears combat boots, ripped up stone-washed jeans, long greasy hair, and can be found at starter-metal concerts and metalcore shows.
I kicked these three hessians in the head when I was in the dance pit.
by Seppuku Smile Jul 9, 2003 share this
4. hessian
Someone who lives in Hesse, a german state. Being a real "Hessian" means you're uber german. Everyone who has seen Sleepy Hollow knows that.
Mr. I: I am Hessian
Mrs. P: Oh...does that mean you're a strange Metalhead who doesn't wash himself?
Mr. I: NO! It meanst that i am living in Hesse near Frankfurt!
Mrs. P: Sorry, didn't want to insult you.
Mr. I: TO LATE! I'LL COME AT NIGHT AND CUT YOUT HEAD OF!!!!
by Tempesta Apr 30, 2004 share this
5. Hessian
One who is supreme in one or another subject.

(A Hessian is a large, blood-thirsty, mercenary used in the Revolutionary war)
JJ: Yo, Johnny is such a hessian in Math class

Steven: Really? I always thought he was stupid

JJ: No, he's a hessian...
6. hessian
A person, often sporting a mullet, who is considered metal and a bit trashy.
There were so many hessians at the Maiden show.
by anonymous Apr 8, 2003 share this
7. Hessian
A westcoast metal head
That guy from California is a huge Maiden fan.
by Ronan Dec 30, 2004 share this
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