Hipsterbation

When one masturbates with their left hand because everyone else masturbates with their right.

"Everyone shakes with their right hand, so you can't let your right be soft! That's why I masturbate with my left hand."

"Wait, so you masturbate with your left hand because no one else does?"

"Yeah"

"Hipsterbation, bro. Stoppit."

Hipsterbation by FreeKayTeeKay March 8, 2012

Haterbation 

1) The puritanical act of hating for personal self-pleasure
2) The self-righteous hating of others for personal pleasure, typified by overly judgmental attitudes concerning the actions and activities of others.

Matthew J. Blumpkin was caught in the act of haterbation by his disapproval of gchats during class.

Haterbation by Indian IT Guy March 15, 2010

hamsterbating 

the hamster version of masturbation
even though they are actually cleaning themselves, it looks more like they are pleasing themselves

Bruno: Hey man, what in the world is your hamster doing?
Alfie: Oh, don't worry about it, he's just hamsterbating.
Bruno: Gross man, you need to get him a woman!

hamsterbating by Hamster man November 11, 2006

Hasterbation 

The act of masterbating to orgasm as quickly as possible, usually due to the need for sexual release in a restricted time period. If the hasterbater does not orgasm in time, they will suffer terribly until another chance arrives.

A quick bit of hasterbation should ensure you won't be sitting through school with blue balls.

Hasterbation by Clorox Cunt October 25, 2016

Hamsturbating 

Think of masturbation. Now think of a cute little hamster fondling himself.

No worries man, he's just hamsturbating.

Hamsturbating by KrisJoy August 18, 2010

Hipsterbation

The act of touching oneself whilst being stimulated by pictures of oversized glasses and ironic tee shirts.

Hipsterbation:
George: Hey, man, where's Theo?
John: Hang on, let me call him.
-phone call-
John: Hey, Theo, where you at?
Theo: -through heavy breathing- Browsing Urban Outfitters online.
-hang up-
George: So what's he doing?
John: Hipsterbating.

Hipsterbation by KleptoInsomniac July 7, 2014

Camsterbation 

Exhibitionistic act of masturbating for one or more other people to watch and/or reciprocate via webcam video chat.

Horny for some camsterbation with you...chat and watch me stroke or get naked and get off with me.

Camsterbation by Dirtywordsfornastybirds June 15, 2018