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geographically illiterate 

a person who has no knowledge of the existence of other countries or where any country is outside of the United States. Someone who sucks at geography.
Kris: Do you know where Ukraine is?
Dave: Is that the country next to India?
Kris: No! God, you're geographically illiterate

Kris: Did you hear that Russia invaded Geogia?
Dave: OMG! Are they going to invade Atlanta?
Kris: No, Georgia the country you dumbass
Dave: There's a country called Georgia?
Kris: You are so geographically illiterate
geographically illiterate by Maves December 12, 2012

national geographic titties

Usually occur after a woman has a child (children). Can resemble two sunny-side-up eggs running down a wall, or two watermelons in a downhill race. Not limited by race, ethnicity, or creed. Almost always an unpleasant suprise discovered after the bra comes off. The larger the breasts, the worse the dimay.
My ex wife Amy looked great with her bra on, but when that came off she had national geographic titties!

Geographic memory 

Similar to the more common photographic memory, but pertaining particularly to geographical detail. Someone with geographic memory is someone who always remembers how to get places without reference and can draw you a map on your napkin if you say please.
"Hey, that guy Jeremy certainly seems to know where he's going." "Yeah, man. He has a geographic memory."
Geographic memory by Goodly June 15, 2013

geographically undesirable

Also Abbrev. as GA

1) When a potential mate / dating prospect lives at a distance.

2) A job prospect in a location where you don't want to live.
1) e.g. I live in New York, She lives in England... she's cute, but she's completely geographically undesirable.

2) e.g. They offered me $120k for the position, but there's no chance I'm moving to French Lick, Indiana. That's way too G.A.

pulling a geographic 

A phrase used in the recovery community describing an illogical belief that switching locations will solve all of one’s life problems when in fact the problems are rooted in one’s self and whatever concurrent substance abuse that exists.
My curious and loving father with the beautiful but self-destructive mind was the brilliant master of pulling a geographic, and each time he made a move, he truly innocently began all over again, mostly believing in himself and his powerful intellect but forgetting his addiction and so he mastered living all over the world in the most magical towns and cities but he died alone and most likely, more afraid of life than death and so he took the leap and left his world behind.

Geographically retarded

When someone is constantly lost and never knows where they are. They don't know where any place is and even with a play by play of how to get there and will STILL get lost.
Nicki: (answers phone)
Eric: I'm lost
Nicki: I gave you directions.
Eric: I dont know where this place is
Nicki: ugh..you are so geographically retarded..you can never find anything