Five on one basketball is the act of masturbating. Since your hand has five fingers(generally) and you use your hand to masturbate(usually), the term was coined.

Man, when I'm stressed out, I get in a good game of

"five on one basketball" and I feel much better.

"Hey, did you and that broad have sex last night?"
"Nah, she got me all worked up and left, so I got in a good session of 'five one one basketball' to cure my blue balls"

Five On One Basketball by Headuardo December 17, 2011

Get merch

the five finger knuckle shuffle on the one-eyed, blue-veined, purple-headed, custard-chucking, salty yogurt slinger.

Yeah, people actually do use this term, but they get it wrong mostlys.

The five finger, knu... aaawwww, fuck it. I whacked off.

the five finger knuckle shuffle on the one-eyed, blue-veined, purple-headed, custard-chucking, salty yogurt slinger. by Gumba Gumba March 15, 2004

Get merch

the five finger knuckle shuffle on the one-eyed, blue-veined, purple-headed, custard-chucking, salty yogurt slinger

Masturbation.
In other words:
Choking the chicken
Choking the monkey
wacking off
jerking off
shaking hands with man's best friend
teasing the weasel

Dude, we all know that last night you did the five finger knuckle shuffle on the one-eyed, blue-veined, purple-headed, custard-chucking, salty yogurt slinger.

the five finger knuckle shuffle on the one-eyed, blue-veined, purple-headed, custard-chucking, salty yogurt slinger by Alex Bahder January 27, 2006

Get merch

Shuffle