Skip to main content

Due to illness. 

A generic and feeble excuse that was highly exploited during the pandemic as to why something will not happen within an agreed timescale, maybe will never happen at all or to explain someone's non attendance at a meeting, event or function.
Dave apologises for not being able to attend baby Tarquin's christening today.
Yes it's really disappointing his missed Tarquin's big day has he said why he can't make it?
He just said it was due to illness.

due to my strong personal convictions 

I wish to stress that this record in no way endorses a belief in the occult.
YOU ARE DEAD AND BURRIED YOU ARE DEAD ( oh no)
That's being revised!
Even as we speak we're synthesizing blood and organs
Synthesizing heart and soul
Even Katy Perry knows you're dead (Oh no)
Won't she be surprised!
When we get your heart to start tomorrow
When you see the chart tomorrow you'll be number one
(Oh no, oh no)

Due to my strong personal convictions (Due to my strong personal convictions)
I wish to stress (I wish to stress)
That this record (That this record)
In no way endorses (In no way endorses)
A belief in the occult (A belief in the occult)

Largely due to the fact that

A phrase used in substitution of the word “because” to make one appear well-versed in the English language
Largely due to the fact that my IQ is substantially greater than that of you, I am thusly superior to you with regard to every conceivable facet of reality

Disney Land is Closed Due to Rain 

1A. A phrase most commonly used when a woman wants someone to know that she is on her period, without saying "I'm on my period.". (Refer to Example 1 and 3)

1b. A subtle way for girls and women to say they are on their period when social situations make them too afraid to say, "I'm on my period.". (Refer to Example 1 and 3)

2. A phrase used when a woman wants to tell her boyfriend that she is on her period. But, for whatever reason, needs to say it subtely. (Refer to Example 2 and 3)
{Example 1}
Girl 1: Whats wrong? Why don't you want to go swimming?

Girl 2: I just don't. You know I heard that Disney Land is Closed Due to Rain!

Girl 1: Oooh, really? That sucks. If I would have known we would have gone swimming another day.

{Example 2}
Boy: Hey babe.... (starts kissing her and making sexual advances)

Girl: Not today babe, Disney Land is Closed Due to Rain.

{Example 3}
Boy: Whats wrong? Your so moody, even my mom wants to know what's wrong!

Girl: I'm sorry honey. I heard Disney Land is Closed Due to Rain.

Boy: Wow, well that would explain it.

[This comment is no longer available due to a copyright claim by Church of Scientology International] 

Probably the only meme that got old the very first day it was released. It refers to Tom Cruise's crazy Scientology video that got removed from YouTube with the text "This video is no longer available due to a copyright claim by Church of Scientology International"
random dude: Tom Cruse sure is crazy eh?
noob: This comment is no longer available due to a copyright claim by Church of Scientology International
random dude: God damn, that meme got old yesterday

I'm a 20-something Hispanic man who has uncontrollable lust for women who spend over 100 dollars on collecting waifus and hours and realized that he can't collect a certain waifu due to random number generator 

Translates to I'm Josie, and 100 dollars is an understatement.
I'm a 20-something Hispanic man who has uncontrollable lust for women who spend over 100 dollars on collecting waifus and hours and realized that he can't collect a certain waifu due to random number generator is something you wouldn't say on a first date.