Girl 1: "Can I like, borrow these shoes? I have a hot date tonight."
Girl 2: "No! They're my favorite pair. Besides, like, your feet are too big."
Girl 1: "Whatever... cunteloupe."
Thirty years ago my cousin Jim was about 18 and he came home about 4 in the morning, and he was kind of drunk, and his Dad was standing there in the kitchen and Jim said, "Dad, do we have any cuntaloupe?" and his Dad said, "Jim, you've been hanging around Andy too much"
During the engagement of sexual intercourse, one's penis might "slip out" and come into contact with a non-penetrable area, resulting in a "broken penis". After some time the penis in question will become inflamed and swollen imitating a sort of bulge, or cantaloupe shape on the shaft of the penis or weenie.
"Last night i was getting it on when all of a sudden i slipped out and nailed her taint. I think i broke my dick, man I'm going to have a fat cantaloupe weenie."
After microwaving the melon to the appropriate temperature and drilling a hole to allow for insertion, John enjoyed an evening of passionateconversation with his cuntelope.