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1.
1. A person who waves his arm infront of a bunch of musicians.
Normally, a conductor thinks the musicians that he is conducting is actully watching him.
But, in reality, more then half of the times, they are just wondering off or too busy sight reading their music.
2. A guy who has actully been through a LOAD of boring music theory class. Where he learned weird stuff such as what is a V7/V chord and how it will be resolved to a I chord in another key. Normally is WAY more knowledgeable then any other person that he is leading
1. Conductor: "You guys need to WATCH ME!"
Violin player: "Okay..."
Trombone player: "I can't see you"
Tuba player: "ZZZzzz... ZZZzzz... HUH?"
Flute player: "...... *fidgets flute, look at stand*"
Trumpet player: "ummm... say what?"
Precussion player: "Blah, my tempo marking is better then yours"

2. Conductor #1: Did you notice? There is a phrasing from measure 4 to measure 26 and then the key changes to the realtive minor, and the mode is a phyrgian mode!
Conductor #2: Yeah! Then on measure 28, there is a V7/V chord, it is held until measure 31 then its finally resloved into a 1 chord in the key of F
Conductor #1: Totally! And they should play softer during this pianissssssssimo pessage... and WAY LOUDER during this Fortissssssssimo pessage
*Both conductor laughs evily as other musicians stares at him wondring what the hell did they just say*
by Tao or Toa August 17, 2005
 
2.
A homosexual male. Called a conductor because they drive their "trains" through other men's "tunnels".

can also be used to express aggravation towards someone.
He totally hiney-humped joe last night. He's a conductor big time.

or

Dude, Dont be such a fucking conductor.
by jenou April 12, 2007
 
3.
A woman musician who works very hard with an musical ensemble to be recognize by the media.
Jill is a conductor who likes when the local press acknowledges her hard work with the symphony.
by violingeek July 26, 2011
 
4.
Whilst a female is involved in the "joyride" of the male genitalia in upright form, the male party proceeds to extend his arm and clutch a braid of females hair, pulling down as to emulate the "honking" of a train's horn.
After performing a conductor on Tina the prositute, she inquired as to why I had done it. In response I said, "Don't stand on the tracks when the train's comin' through bitch!"
by Dong Fied August 31, 2004