Gloves used in the practice of yarndling, specifically competitive threading. Origin unknown, possibly proto-Albanian. Traditionally composed of beaverskin. Bifurcated now supersede the non-bifurcated variety, due to ease of kedding.
"Hello Jim, have you been drying your chorns this afternoon?"
"Yes, Derek, they should be ready to use when the knap's fully bronzed."
Popularized by the movie, "The Heathers", this phrase is said in response to a request one deems impossible or absurd (much like being gently fucked with a chainsaw). It's basically a way of showing someone how ridiculous what they've just asked sounds.
Ex.
Veronica: “Why can’t we talk to other kinds of people?”
Heather Chandler: “Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. Do I look like Mother Theresa?”
Dylan: "Hey Nick can I borrow your car once its out of the shop?"
"Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. You crashed it just last week!"
Choinked is when you’re getting a blowjob and she is too toothy with it, and she scraped your mushroom tip with her teeth.
Glen: “Dude, I’ve had to free-ball now for 6 weeks ‘cause Stephany Choinked the fuck out my tip dog for real. Shit be more sore then a tube of preparation H.”
Kevin: “Dude, seriously, I hate when my tip gets Choinked so now I only get my top spun from bitches with no teeth. Feels like butter now and I haven’t been Choinked in 3 years. Feels good bro seriously.”