When you are taking a shit and a woman starts giving you a blowjob, then as you’re shitting the water from the turd splashed up and hits her in the face while blowing you.
Oh my god my turd splashed a lot of water up while taking a shit and hit Tina in the face while she was giving me a blumpkin, she totally got blump-kissed
Cigarette: Northern slang for a cigarette, used oft by mashed up mancunian ravers becasue of the resemblance of a hot(electric)stove to the end of a lit cigarette. Originated circa 1991 in the early halcyon days of the rave culture; we speculate during a drug fuelled hallucination by said manc.
'fuck me noel, i am bolloxed, is that a ciggy in your mouth, or the stove from me 'nans kitchen'/
General use: 'Give us a stove you cunt'