Shitting on a bench at 3 in the morning

The cruelest and toughest sport known to mankind.

shitting on a bench at 3 in the morning. its a game of agility, patience, and reflex. will someone find you? book it quickly with shit spilling behind you. will your muscles fail hope you catch yourself before you land in your own shit. accidentally shit on a homeless person? what the fuck is wrong with you are you blind? get your ass pecked by a bird? shit on the bird too. accidentally shit out of your mouth instead of your ass? what the fuck see a doctor. if you think you have what it takes, snort some cocaine and see where you end up.

Shitting on a bench at 3 in the morning by chimken_nunget May 18, 2021

you a bench 

when a five year old swears

(in kindergarten)
why Mrs. Kelly did you give me a c- ya know you a bench.

you a bench by Yosniel December 22, 2017

face like a welders bench 

based on a used welders bench, when welding lots of small lumps of metal fly of the object being welded as sparks and solidify on the bench giving it a spotted lumpy look. therefore a girl with a face like a welders bench is ugly, spotty, has a pock marked face, generally rough and not a pleasant sight

A: eeeuurrgh, that lucy's got a face like a welders bench
B: yeh she's well butters

face like a welders bench by ontour May 25, 2012

Claim a Johnny Bench 

When something that was once at the forefront of popular culture or national consciousness has become generationally extinct.

Tammy: "Do you remember that Valley Girl song?"
Nate: "I'm going to have to claim a Johnny Bench on that one."

Claim a Johnny Bench by Dean Houser December 9, 2008

A Kaulia Bench

A bench with no legs, basically a plank on the ground.

That’s not a plank, it’s a Kaulia Bench.

A Kaulia Bench by Anonymous Citizen September 22, 2020

claim a Johnny Bench 

When something that was once at the forefront of popular culture or national consciousness has become generationally extinct.

Tammy: "Do you remember that Valley Girl song?"
Nate: "I'm going to have to claim a Johnny Bench on that one."

claim a Johnny Bench by Dean Houser November 11, 2008