Twitter

A social networking website for twits (hence the name "Twitter") who constantly post "tweets" for everything they are doing, 24 hours a day, even though they have no followers because everyone on it other than a twit is a celebrity.

"I have just woken up at 8:00 am"

"I have just eaten a bowl of cereal"

"I have just released some shit from my butt into the toilet."

"I have just been called a twit by all 465 people who walked by me."

"I am epic" *Crash while sending*

"My computer crashed while trying to send that tweet on Twitter"

LOOK, YOU LONERS. NOBODY GIVE A FUCKING SHIT ABOUT YOUR TWEETS!!!

by likeordie November 15, 2011

Twitter

An act of sodomy in which two male partners jam their semi erect penis' into the others anus simultaneously.

"I hope I don't get a hard on tonight, Lemont and I are going to twitter."

by Merriam Websters Dictionary June 12, 2009

Twitter

The proof that some people are hopelessly dumb and self centered. Twitter is probably one of the leading causes of illiteracy in the US.

Friend #1: Did you read the tweet that I just posted
Friend #2: No, I don't need to know what you are doing all the time, I have an acutal life, so I don't use twitter

by fighter2650 June 10, 2011

Twitter

The act of smacking your penis on a woman's vaginal area... Pre, mid, or post coitally.

Dude I had to get my Twitter on, so I twittled that that chick after we did the deed!

by SuperDavey May 7, 2009

Twitter

To play with yourself/masturbate. More often used to describe female masturabtion

I twittered her pussy and she squirted all over

by PatGoat123456 November 17, 2009

Twitter

A complicated website used by old people who think Twitter is what people use nowadays. Many TV and radio shows and celebrities boast about having a Twitter account.
Twitter also restricts you to 140 characters (WHY?!?!) and there are no privacy settings.
There is also hardly anything to do. It's like a complicated, basic Facebook.
The reason it's 'complicated' is because nobody understands how you USE the site; what's 'retweeting'?, what are these '@Mentions'? IT'S COMPLICATED!

Person A: 'Hey follow me on Twitter!'
Person B: 'Dude, seriously, get a Facebook.'

by Alexander_Banks June 1, 2011

Twitter

A hellhole filled with gays and dream stans. Do anything on there and you will be cancelled.

Man 1: I use twitter
Man 2: wtf ew

by KAINEBLoX November 25, 2021