A large town famed for its 90% chav population. Home town of the famous Ali G, shown in the famous film "Ali G in da house". Has a cinema, some middle class shops and a skate park - also home to the street-famous Hyde Park. Nobody who lives in Staines ever amounts to much or goes anywhere particularly interesting. The town is twinned with Melun in France, because nobody sane has ever heard about or cares about either of these places.
"Why don't we go to Staines?" "WHERE?"