Santa Clause: A big fat man, leaving gifts for little children (What do you think he's hoping to get in return?), that doesn't sound creepy, just wait, "Santa" get little children to sit on his lap, "little people" make his "toys"...
Santa Clause = Pedophile
by Cody Rogers July 17, 2006
An unfortunate but extremely common misspelling of Santa Claus, a fat man who breaks into people's homes every December 24th, guzzles their milk, devours their cookies, and usually leaves presents under the tree -- though if your children behaved especially shittly earlier in the year, a lump of coal that's been uranated on will be deposited in their Christmas stocking instead of brightly-wrapped presents.
Santa usually enters people's homes via the fireplace chimney; though if the chimney's plugged up, the flue is closed, if a fire is still burning, or if the person lives in an apartment and has no chimney, he'll find some other method of entrance and egress -- such as by jimmying a window.
Santa usually enters people's homes via the fireplace chimney; though if the chimney's plugged up, the flue is closed, if a fire is still burning, or if the person lives in an apartment and has no chimney, he'll find some other method of entrance and egress -- such as by jimmying a window.
Santa Clause came down the chimney last night and left a huge pile of coal that smelled like piss! Wonder what the children did to piddle off the fat bastard so much?!?
by Telephony December 26, 2020
A stalker of small children.
A pervert of the kids.
A slave Driver of the elves.
A thief of the cookies.
A legal immigrant to the world.
A rebel without a cause.
Have you ever wonder what happens to children that wake up to find him?
He rapes them then bashes there heads again the chimney.
He watches you, Everywhere.
Him and God are bother helpless stalkers.
What do we do to this flying, fat, red blob of jolly madness?
I say we touch his jolly ass.
He's obviously a terrorist.
He isolates his workers so no one from our outside world could know,
That Santa has a thing for the butt.
Unscramble Santa.
And you get Satan.
Santa is the Devil.
Santa toke over Jesus Christs Birthday.
It's cause Santa is Satan.
He even wears Satan's theme color.
Red.
Also the color of Blood.
Scared Yet?
You should Be.
A pervert of the kids.
A slave Driver of the elves.
A thief of the cookies.
A legal immigrant to the world.
A rebel without a cause.
Have you ever wonder what happens to children that wake up to find him?
He rapes them then bashes there heads again the chimney.
He watches you, Everywhere.
Him and God are bother helpless stalkers.
What do we do to this flying, fat, red blob of jolly madness?
I say we touch his jolly ass.
He's obviously a terrorist.
He isolates his workers so no one from our outside world could know,
That Santa has a thing for the butt.
Unscramble Santa.
And you get Satan.
Santa is the Devil.
Santa toke over Jesus Christs Birthday.
It's cause Santa is Satan.
He even wears Satan's theme color.
Red.
Also the color of Blood.
Scared Yet?
You should Be.
Santa Clause:: Ho Ho Ho, Merry Christmas!
Kid:: I want a hot wheels toy set!
Santa:: I want to show you the toys in my master bedroom that has padlocks on the doors
Kid:: Yaaay!
Kid:: I want a hot wheels toy set!
Santa:: I want to show you the toys in my master bedroom that has padlocks on the doors
Kid:: Yaaay!
by Hawkington =]] February 3, 2008
The clauses which detail Kris Kringle under the North Pole Act of 1436.
Clause 1, Subsection A states that: Saint Nicholas must manufacture a wide variety of games, tools, and miscellaneous objects for children under the age of 12 in all countries of the world.
Clause 1, Subsection B states that: Saint Nicholas must do so for eternity, without pay, and must aquire the following traits: Obesity, A long white beard, a red suit, a fondness for burnt cookies and warm milk.
Clause 1, Subsection A states that: Saint Nicholas must manufacture a wide variety of games, tools, and miscellaneous objects for children under the age of 12 in all countries of the world.
Clause 1, Subsection B states that: Saint Nicholas must do so for eternity, without pay, and must aquire the following traits: Obesity, A long white beard, a red suit, a fondness for burnt cookies and warm milk.
Evil Little Boy: "Where are my presents?"
Mom: "You were naughty this year, so Santa didn't bring you any."
Evil Little Boy: "Na-uh! According to Clause 1, Subsection A and B, of the Santa Clauses, Santa is required to bring me my demanded presents!"
Mom: "You were naughty this year, so Santa didn't bring you any."
Evil Little Boy: "Na-uh! According to Clause 1, Subsection A and B, of the Santa Clauses, Santa is required to bring me my demanded presents!"
by Assasinof6 March 12, 2010
Gent 1:Aye chap, why you always have to wail on me. I'd much rather prefer a santa clause.
Gent 2:Righto
Gent 2:Righto
by shib January 26, 2005
by JJ June 30, 2004
Child: Mommy Santa Clause visited me last night. Mom: What did he bring you? Child: He called it a hand job!
by TheKamiSama0 October 14, 2012