Telephony's definitions

doucheketeers

Douchebags. Plain and simple.

Our town/county has miles and miles and miles of bike trails yet some of these risk taking doucheketeers INSIST on riding in the streets. During rush hour. On some pretty windy roads. AND sometimes ride 2 or 3 even 4 abreast across the road.

by Telephony June 10, 2013

windometer

Plain and simple: an anemometer.
An anemometer is an instrument used for measuring wind speed.

Winds were clocked with my stupid sodding "rotten cat pee yellow" portable digital "windometer" (as JD from JD Quad in the UK calls them even though those things are actually called, "anemometers") ;-) as being variable to 3.60mph (4.36kph) at the surface.

by Telephony May 25, 2019

birddouche

What somebody who hates to have to constantly refill a birdbath might call it.

{Martha}: Kevin, I told you to refill that goddamn birdbath every day!
{Kevin}: Aw mom, I forgot. I'll get the hose and fill the damn birddouche right away.

by Telephony August 21, 2013

pathetic cringing little milksop

Far, far worse than a regular milksop; the pathetic cringing little milksop is not only an unmanly man, he may also be a whining little faggot, a crying sore loser, a truly pussywhipped man, a wholly dickwhipped woman, or other assorted wastoid.

Jake is such a pathetic cringing little milksop it ain't even funny -- the little bitch whines about anything and everything. He is truly an oxygen thief.

by Telephony December 17, 2011

piss lens

A yellow photographic / videographic lens filter, making the entire scene look as though somebody had urinated all over the place -- on people, walls, furniture, plants -- I mean EVERYTHING!

A good part of the movie,"Behind Enemy Lines II" was filmed with a damn piss lens!

by Telephony November 5, 2017

The Shampoo Killer

Somebody who pisses into bottles of shampoo, thus ruining them.

John Grass uranated into bottles of shampoo (thus converting them into shampee) at the Juneau Receiving Home in the very early-1980s, and subsequently earned the nickname "The Shampoo Killer".

by Telephony October 21, 2010

Freshness With a Fuck

A fake, phoney-bologna jingle sung to the tune of the Glade Spin-Fresh air deodouriser jingle.
The phrase, "plug it up" is how one would say, "plug it in" in the UK.

♫Freshness with a fuck,♫
♫Plug it up plug it up!♫

The phrase, "plug it up" is how one says, "plug it in" in the UK.

by Telephony July 13, 2017