Telephony's definitions

PWPOSMF

An acronym that stands for "Pussywhipped Piece Of Shit Motherfucker".

Much, much worse (O GOD SO MUCH WORSE!!!) than a POS.
Example: "John is such a PWPOSMF it ain't even funny. :-("

by Telephony December 14, 2010

pee IN the toliet, not ON the toliet!

An admonishment given to males with bad aim while passing micturition (pissing) into a regular sit-down toliet bowl.

I just had cataract surgery; now I can pee IN the toliet, not ON the toliet!

by Telephony June 15, 2014

amperstand

A very common misspelling of the word, "ampersand" -- the 'and' symbol -- yeah this thing: ---> &

{Craig}: Hey -=ShoEboX=-, when did you name your cat Amperstand?
{-=ShoEboX=-}: It's Ampersand dammit! AMPERSAND!!!

by Telephony March 9, 2015

birddouche

What somebody who hates to have to constantly refill a birdbath might call it.

{Martha}: Kevin, I told you to refill that goddamn birdbath every day!
{Kevin}: Aw mom, I forgot. I'll get the hose and fill the damn birddouche right away.

by Telephony August 21, 2013

windometer

Plain and simple: an anemometer.
An anemometer is an instrument used for measuring wind speed.

Winds were clocked with my stupid sodding "rotten cat pee yellow" portable digital "windometer" (as JD from JD Quad in the UK calls them even though those things are actually called, "anemometers") ;-) as being variable to 3.60mph (4.36kph) at the surface.

by Telephony May 25, 2019

bloody hatchet wound

Slang term for the female cunt; esp. if that pussy's owner is on the rag.

Don't fuck Jessica tonight; she has a bloody hatchet wound and you'll get your dick covered in her menstruation!!!

by Telephony September 30, 2018

corporate douche

The president of a company who has lousy, bottom-of-the-barrel customer service and even shittier TV commercials is known as a corporate douche.
The corporate version of an asshaberdasher.

The head of Wall*Mart is such a huge corporate douche for having commercials made using that swollen and distended urine-yellow smiley dressed up in a Zorro costume floating around, breaking shit, and hacking at store price flares with this big-ass knife!

by Telephony August 12, 2016