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Sadsturbate 

Masturbation while in an intense period of remorse or sadness, lubrication naturally forming from tears raining down on one's frowny poundy
Sam was so upset when the Patriots lost to the Ravens that he sadsturbated for months in his room before he ran out of tears and boners.
Sadsturbate by TeamKeefe January 23, 2013

Sadsturbate 

When you masturbate to take your mind off something that's making you sad.
"Aw man...I'm so sad about my girl breaking up with me...I can't sleep..."
"Time to sadsturbate!"
Sadsturbate by bassmanmiles92 June 29, 2011

Sadsturbate 

When you cry while masturbating. Usually occurs on a Saturday night after realizing that you'll die alone.
Realized I'll never find true love and decided to sadsturbate the pain and emotional turmoil away.

Sadsturbate 

Something emo kids do in the dark in their room after breaking up with their boyfriend (all emo boys are gay) for the eighth time that week.
The process involves crying profusely and masturbating simultaneously, using the tears as lube.
This has been shown to cause cancer in laboratory animals.
Shane's such a little bitch, he sadsturbates in his room. His dick is covered in mascara.
Sadsturbate by Addison Trent January 16, 2009

sadsturbate 

What people in long-distance relationships do during weekdays.
Kelsey's boyfriend hasn't visited recently... She must sadsturbate a lot.
sadsturbate by kxpe May 2, 2011

Sadsturbate 

The act of masturbating while sad or depressed. Blood is often used as a lubricant for this activity.
After she broke up with me i sadsturbated violently and used my blood as lubricant.
Sadsturbate by Dillypoo November 3, 2009