Top Definition
When it is no longer necessary to suck up to Corporate America in order to earn a living. This means giving up crowded airports, unnecessary meetings, a Sales Manager that is 20 years your junior telling you how badly that you suck, Action Plans, Quotas, more meetings, a business suit, white shirt and tie, ulcers and stomach cramps.

Being genuinely retired means that you began long ago to plan for the future and can now tell everyone except Mother Nature and Father Time to 'kiss ass'
I am retired, so leave me alone.
by Cosmicstargoat June 16, 2004
A euphemism for retarded, as gosh is a euphemism for God and darn is a euphemism for damn.
"I think she might be retired."
by Skalator June 08, 2009
The feeling of being both tired and retarded at the same time. The feeling usually occurs at work on a Monday after binge drinking all weekend.
"Holy crap, I am so retired."
"Dude, seriously you are freakin' retired!"
by Maweasal February 29, 2008
-to dismiss someone
-when someone stretches something that used to be funny to the point where it isnt (killed it)
-I'm Janey, and I have buck teeth and I kinda smell like raggedy cabbage.
-.....Alright, you're retired.

-Dude, it's retired. You fuckin killed it
by nicole April 20, 2004
The phenomenom in which a person is inexplicably alert upon waking but soon falls into a sleepy stupor.
This morning I woke up 30 mins before the alarm and was so alert that I could not fall back asleep and now...
I am so re-tired i will need a caffine enema to make it to lunch.
by Schneppleupagus October 05, 2010
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