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1.
A school in the glorious hellhole of barrow in furness. Old, Crumbling and too hot in winter too cold in summer. (thats right, when we wear big thick jumpers and ties in winter, they shut the windows and turn ALL the heaters on, and in summer, good ol' cold rainy british summer, when we're wearing stupid green polo shirts that are rather thin, they open ALL the windows and doors).One of the teachers (*cough*KIDGE*cough*) has bright purple hair, very weird glasses a barbie watch and dresses like its halloween every day.Oh and shes like ninety and traps cats. And then they tell us that we have to have "normal" coloured hair. Hypocrites. Oh yeah, and the humanities corridoor smells of damp fags (fags = ciggarettes). But dont worry, theyre knocking it down soon, so they can mix us with people (I say people, but most of them are ignorant, stupid thuggish chavs), from Thorncliffe and Alfred Barrow school.

Oh the joy. The inexplicable joy.


Parkview is a good place to come for some bizzarre forms of torture.
Firstly, you can be taught by people with senile dementia, or at least short term memory loss.
"If anyone wants to use crayons, then they're at the front"
*people move to get crayons*
"whats all this MOVEMENT!!??"
I rest my case.
Or, if you go in the cold, windy, wet month of october, you will be made to run around the field in your shorts and t-shirt, whilst being laughed at by your sporty peers, who are obviously favoured by the P.E teachers.
Or you could have a nice french lesson with the Rothinator.
She's bags of fun.

There are SOME ways to enjoy yourself.
There is hilarity in science lessons...
Just watching the teacher prnace around like a puff.. talking about Villi and Enzymes...
Or maybe cover a pritt stick in vasolene from your friends pencil case, and give it to the woman who is with your chinese friend, in the hope that the very annoying woman will set herself alight with a bunsen burner.




Or, you could just go to bernards.





by ImInAustenAndIlikeNoodles October 25, 2008