When a person tells another person to do a thing that clearly cannot be done. Often used when a person has fucked up, but is too proud to admit it, and instead places the blame on someone else.
Employee: "But, you told me to do it..."
Boss: "Yes, well if I told you to fuck a spider on the moon, would you do it?"
'Daphne put down your tea and come ride this veiny meatstick. Youre being a moonspider just like everyone said you would be when they warned me not to pursue you and perhaps try to ensnare a sun parrot or maybe a velvet waterfly. This is total bullshit. I should not put up with this up in here....NOT UP IN HERE!!! '
Cigarette: Northern slang for a cigarette, used oft by mashed up mancunian ravers becasue of the resemblance of a hot(electric)stove to the end of a lit cigarette. Originated circa 1991 in the early halcyon days of the rave culture; we speculate during a drug fuelled hallucination by said manc.
'fuck me noel, i am bolloxed, is that a ciggy in your mouth, or the stove from me 'nans kitchen'/
General use: 'Give us a stove you cunt'
A hardo is a person who tries extremely hard at everything. Most times a hardo will try very hard at things that do not require excessive effort. For example, sports practices, gym class, etc.
Wow did you see Jack at practice today? What a hardo!