When you poop in your hand and shape it into a mitten and give someone a handjob.
I cant believe that bitch gave me a mittens.
by Philosophically March 11, 2011
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The act of "wearing" your bird like a mitten.
Specifically, thumb in the bullseye and digits up the furry cup

Man: fancy a mitten?
Woman: lets rock!
by dogga January 3, 2006
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My Mittens are all calased up from liftin weights.
by Ashley42 August 2, 2008
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a very pro priest back in Nothing Personal that left a mark on everybody in the guild
mittens once said, "i prefer beetle borgs over power rangers."
by sicariusroguelawl July 11, 2008
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The act of fingering 2 women at the same time on a cold winters day "Michigan Mittens"
Troy had to walk a mile in the snow to get to the party, luckily a couple of girls let him try on some "Michigan Mittens"
by LK411 March 1, 2021
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Gloves. Specifically, gloves worn while rowing, lifting weights, or doing any other activity that normally causes a person to develop callouses on his or her hands. Refusal to remove and dispose of these gloves earns the wearer the title "Princess Bitch Mittens."
"Uh oh. Lisa snuck her bitch mittens into the boat again."
by yay_fisticuffs November 6, 2012
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In a world, where good cop meets nice cop... you have, Officers Mittens & Darling. Their sole motivation for entering law enforcement came from the same cause. Taking down the person responsible for killing their ethnic families. Baron von Grant. Grant, a Nazi sympathizer, is hellbent on seeing through a plan he calls "the Paco-ronus". A badly punned usage of the Harry Potter spell Patronus; where he intends to build a wall along the border. Davis dipping all "undesirables" in the process... Luckily for humanity, Officer Mittens & Darling are both white, and take him out for ice cream and tickles instead.
If it weren't for the adorable Mittens & Darling, I'd probably have a hot Takis up my dickhole right about now.
by PacoElTaco May 6, 2018
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