defcon 1

a kick ass network center where you go and own the shit out of noobs (like tom ott) with headshots.

"you andy, u wanna go to D1 2day so we can pwn tom?"

by |M-=0=-W| Owns All!!! April 12, 2004

Defcon Shit System

Defcon 5: No Threat. You probably just took a huge shit.
Defcon 4: There's potential. Either enough time has passed since your last shit, or your last shit you don't feel emptied you out, or you feel slightly unwell and could need to take a shit earlier than usual.
Defcon 3: Very slight pressure. If you really, really needed to, you could probably for some turds out. If you do, it will probably be vey unfulfilling.

Defcon 2: The normal needing to shit. Ideal conditions under which to shit.
Defcon 1: Shit imminent. Basically, you better have your pants dropping as you hit the bathroom door or you're going to have a problem on your hands.

Dude, I'm currently at Defcon shit system level 3. We should probably pull over so I can shit soon.

by Tony's Pickle Jar March 1, 2023

Going Defcon One

Having something said to you, and then you turn around and kill the guy with an extension cord, thus, going defcon one.

"Don't make me go defcon one on your ass"

by Randyg Giesinger July 21, 2004

Defcon

pro-noun; the Def Condition- a measurement scale which determines the realistic level of how def a person, place or thing is.

Shogun Assassin is the greatest martial arts movie ever made, I would rate it a 5/5 on the DefCon scale

by Damian Thorne March 8, 2023

defcon scavenger hunt

The Defcon Scavenger Hunt is a ridiculously-themed, fast-paced hunt across the city of Las Vegas by a bunch of hackers to prove how people can obtain a million strange things in a single weekend.

This year I participated in the Defcon Scavenger Hunt and talked to tons of new people and almost ended up in prison!

by va1ka August 8, 2015