Crank

(Noun) Typically an older conservative person who’s usually retired and spends a lot of time on their recliner watching Fox News and finding frivolous things to complain about. Prone to Not In My Back Yard (NIMBY) outrage, they have a hot temper and very willing to get messy. Some of the most entitled people you’ll ever meet, ready to throw fits to get what they want, and often do. Often associated but not limited to the Baby Boomer generation.

Did you hear about those local cranks opposing that new sports field?

Shut up you old crank

by HBDGRIMACE July 19, 2023

Crank

Cry wank

Person 1 "oh look there's Dave cranking into a pool of his own tears"
Person 2 "Yeah he does that"

by The Gadd August 14, 2015

Crank

To add custom graphics, text, word bubbles, etc directly on top of any picture on any website

I cranked a picture of Paris Hilton last night and gave her a cold sore and a miniature member of NKOTB in her handbag.

by CeCeBeckett April 7, 2008

Crank

To crank is to cry and wank at the same time.

The boy's hero was on tv accepting a prestigious award, he cried as he felt so proud of his hero, he was also aroused and masturbating at the same time. Therefore the boy was having a CRANK or CRANKING

by Ambush Paddington September 22, 2008

Crank

A crappy prank.
Usually used when someone makes a crappy phone call.

-Who was that on the phone?
--Oh just another crank call
-Oh not that good?

by Zach Castanon August 26, 2007

Crank

The act of crying whilst masturbating. Often performed by self loathing emos whilst slashing their wrists.

Jack found life to be so dire, he couldn't help but have a crank.

by Jayisfap April 13, 2010

Crank

1. Penis.
2. To have a wank in the style of someone attempting to start a vintage car.
3. A bathroom multitasking exercise. A shit and a wank performed simultaneously by someone with an extremely busy schedule.
4. To cry and wank at the same time.

1. After she kicked David in the balls his crank didn't work for 6 days.
2. I was so busy I had to perform a crank.
3. I was so busy a crank was the only option.
4. Dude 1: "Yeah, Adam was so in love with her he has a crank."
Dude 2: "NO FUCKING WAY! That's bad bro."

by Daniel Venning January 21, 2009