a terrible excuse for rock music
they really deserve the genre "alternative bullshit"
did you hear that song?
wait....that was a song.i thought that was some crappy ass garage band.
no man that was by coldplay
by bragkiller December 20, 2008
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Generic rock band who sounds like all of the 1000 "alternative" bands you hear on the FM radio.
Oh god Coldplay is on, let me change the channel.

or

"You know who I know you're gay?"

"How?"

"You like Coldplay"
by turn that shit off April 24, 2007
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Way overrated band that just sounds like noise.
by asy September 4, 2006
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A terribly overrated and mediocre band. Basically they sound like Radiohead if they had gotten stuck on "The Bends" and never evolved their sound. Highly accessible and digestible, usually adored by people who think Radiohead is "too weird" or girls who think they like "deep" music. Lead vocalist Chris Martin is a pretentious d-bag whose lyrics consist of nothing but stale cliches passed off as life-changing revelations.
Coldplay can be identified by their trite, universal lyrics like: "Every step that you take / could be your biggest mistake / It could bend or it could break / But that's the risk that you take"
by EonBlue987 May 11, 2008
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1. A band that writes easily accessible music that happens to be entirely void of meaningful substance.

2. Adult contemporary emo

3. Shit on a stick
Hi! My name is Chris Martin from the rock and roll band Coldplay. All I want to do is be like Thom Yorke, save the world, and name my kids after fruit!! OMG <333
by likeyehokwhatev May 16, 2007
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Noise that people call music and every song sounds the same.

Just a way for people to be cool
The sound of styrofoam rubbing together is Coldplay.

or

Eww, you like Coldplay? You must hate life!
by Micheal Ricard III February 20, 2009
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Possibly the lamest band in existence. Their entire catalogue is nearly a carbon copy of a short phase Radiohead went through before moving onto other things like people with actual artistic talent tend to do. Coldplay's lyrics are horridly generic, and their lead singer (Chris Martin) likes to wallow in his own sadness and deliver all his lines as if he's about to start crying at any second like a giant doucher.

Coldplay fans often claim to like the band on the grounds that their lyrics are really provocative and profound. It is best to avoid all interaction with these people, as their semi-retardation has been proven to be contagious. They can be identified by the shit stains around their eyes, nose, and mouth due to them habitually burying their heads in their own, and each other's, anuses
Coldplay fan: Dude WTF!? I passed off these Coldplay lyrics as my own work for this poetry assignment in English, didn't get caught, and STILL got a D!! Plus now the short bus shows up at my house every day before school to pick me up! FML!
Person with any musical knowledge whatsoever: Just stay at least 10 feet away from me dude.

12-year-old girl: Hey Chris Martin, thanks for coming over to have sex with me.
Chris Martin: Are you kidding? I like men. I just need your diary to write 12 new songs for the next Coldplay album.
by GrandmaTakeMeHome May 9, 2011
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