A small town to the west of Ottawa, Canada. Located on a small river with a charming old town area, and a big fair in the summer, Almonte is a quaint place to visit. But not such a nice place to live. Generally inhabited with closed-minded hicks and preppy teenagers, this place is full of judgmental people who hate the idea of anything mildly different. Like a stereotyped high school in a town.
by Lolocakes February 22, 2009
A small town in Michigan that nobody gives a shit about and it's out in the sticks' where there's barely civilization and they're favorite sexual partners are their siblings or cousins.
They have to pass over M-53 highway just to get to the mall.
They party in run down shacks/barns example of one they call the 'man cave',the girls are either anorexic with nasty scene hair or fat and have pink hair.
The dudes are either hick as can be, or straight stoned stupid. They like coming down to the city, usually around Partridge Creek/Lakeside mall to attempt to pick up chicks. Or for the some that actually own computers, they prefer to try spittin' game online. The girls are very insecure, and obviously no one wants their boyfriends so they can straight up defensive over nothing. No one there really cares about the town of Almont.They are all disgusting.
The boys have very small penises when erected .
And most of the girls resemble roadkill.
Incest bitches much? haha
They have to pass over M-53 highway just to get to the mall.
They party in run down shacks/barns example of one they call the 'man cave',the girls are either anorexic with nasty scene hair or fat and have pink hair.
The dudes are either hick as can be, or straight stoned stupid. They like coming down to the city, usually around Partridge Creek/Lakeside mall to attempt to pick up chicks. Or for the some that actually own computers, they prefer to try spittin' game online. The girls are very insecure, and obviously no one wants their boyfriends so they can straight up defensive over nothing. No one there really cares about the town of Almont.They are all disgusting.
The boys have very small penises when erected .
And most of the girls resemble roadkill.
Incest bitches much? haha
Boy: 'ay cutie how ya' doin' todaay
Girl:Good, are you from Tennessee with that accent?
Boy: Nah sugaplum I'm from Almont.
Girl:Oh okay so you fingerbang your sister , and your mother cooks raccoon for thanksgiving.
Boy:Yessssiiiiiiiiirrrrreeeeeeeeeeee
Girl:Good, are you from Tennessee with that accent?
Boy: Nah sugaplum I'm from Almont.
Girl:Oh okay so you fingerbang your sister , and your mother cooks raccoon for thanksgiving.
Boy:Yessssiiiiiiiiirrrrreeeeeeeeeeee
by BUTCHDYKEANDINFAMOUSSTALKER December 15, 2010
A small town in the thumb of michigan that has a population made up of rednecks, whores, attention whores, douche bags, rednecks, and only a small population of decent people... did I mention rednecks? There is absolutely nothing to do in this town, and you will for sure regret moving here. The drama is insanely ignorant, mostly between the attention whores and the just plain whores.
Rednecks- Usually guys who live in the Almont trailer park and drive a beaten up, rusted, dented old chevy or ford truck and think they're the shit. They also eat raccoon for dinner.
Whores- Do I have to explain? They're probably the worst breed of Almontians except attention whores.
Attention whores- Girls who go around creating all the fucked up ignorant drama in this town. Usually start it on facebook or myspace. Usually post pictures on facebook saying how ugly they are for attention. Also, are frequent participators in the dreaded "duckface."
Douchebags- Usually guys who think they're "hood" when in reality, they live in the subburbs of Almont with their parents.
Decent people- If you find one of these people in Almont, keep them. They're very rare.
Rednecks- Usually guys who live in the Almont trailer park and drive a beaten up, rusted, dented old chevy or ford truck and think they're the shit. They also eat raccoon for dinner.
Whores- Do I have to explain? They're probably the worst breed of Almontians except attention whores.
Attention whores- Girls who go around creating all the fucked up ignorant drama in this town. Usually start it on facebook or myspace. Usually post pictures on facebook saying how ugly they are for attention. Also, are frequent participators in the dreaded "duckface."
Douchebags- Usually guys who think they're "hood" when in reality, they live in the subburbs of Almont with their parents.
Decent people- If you find one of these people in Almont, keep them. They're very rare.
by YYoyoyoyoyoyo March 1, 2012
by Almonteisthebae March 30, 2017
Rhea Almonte is my wife.
by Fluffybaby January 22, 2022
by meaninglessneck December 5, 2016