1. A short (sometimes fat) mom who gives her kids (little angels) absolutely no freedom by scheduling everything known to man. Between 3:30 and 6:30. Even scheduling time able to be spent with friends. They also drive the biggest SUV/ minivan around and complain about gas prices. The inside do there SUV/minivan is usually filled with cheerios, sticky stuff, and other assorted snacks and drink causing a weird funky-ass smell. They are also the people at soccer and other non-contact sport) resulting in the growth of pussy children) with noise making objects such as horns, air horns, and other loud obnoxious things. You may also see them taking over the road and cutting you off on the road resulting in flipping people off, head-on collisions, and ass kicking. They are also the people who put censors on anything. You can’t say a curse near the children otherwise you will get yelled at. There kids are based around being spoiled and ESRB ratings, movie ratings and edited music. They are the people with the kids who yell at there parents and control the household. Usually married but dad is never around.
While driving in my 69 Roadrunner to buy my kids the new Grand theft auto game and a KORN CD, a Dodge Caravan cut me off nearly hitting my car resulting in a soccer mom ass whooping. When I got to the store and my kids got the game and CD, another soccer mom (who was buying her bratty children 2 copies of the same Sponge bob game) told me that am inappropriate for children so I told her to fuck off and let me raise my own children. Then while blasting the KORN CD near a soccer game a heard of coffee drinking soccer moms told me to turn it down because of language which I just turned up even louder.
by CWC November 28, 2006
A mom whom feel that they need to protect their kids from the evils of the world wide web, t.v., and music. Even though there aren't really any. Like only watch movies pg and under, and tv-pg and under. There kid might not get to hear the greatness of heavy metal too.
Person1:I really want this death cd.
Person2:Yeah Death is awesome.
Soccermom:Heavy metal is the devil. You shouldn't be listening to that. Instead go pick up a Hannah Montana cd.
Person1:Shut up. Her singing makes my ears bleed.
Soccermom:HOW DARE YOU TELL ME TO SHUT UP!!!!
Person2:Bitch your the one who are trying to tell us what to do.
Soccer mom:Don't say that in front of my kids.
Person1:We don't care.(Gives the bird.)
Soccermom leaves.
Person2:stupid soccer mom.
Person2:Yeah Death is awesome.
Soccermom:Heavy metal is the devil. You shouldn't be listening to that. Instead go pick up a Hannah Montana cd.
Person1:Shut up. Her singing makes my ears bleed.
Soccermom:HOW DARE YOU TELL ME TO SHUT UP!!!!
Person2:Bitch your the one who are trying to tell us what to do.
Soccer mom:Don't say that in front of my kids.
Person1:We don't care.(Gives the bird.)
Soccermom leaves.
Person2:stupid soccer mom.
by vfdc June 27, 2007
an evil underground network of overprotective 30-40 yearolds who dirve around in s.u.v's or minie vans or volvo's who hate tv, internet and teenagers. this "mafia" of soccer momsknows everything that goes on in your town and gossips about every little thing that other peoples kids do.
by milo March 9, 2004
They name their children Madison, Britney, Caitlyn, Tanner, Bryce, Trevor... they drive an SUV or minivan embossed with soccer ball decals and honor student bumper stickers... their two most prized possessions: their cell phone and their sport water bottle... their husbands are never around, either at work or playing golf... they live in a constant state of suspicion of anyone "different" or not from their neighborhood (which usually is gated to keep those other people out).
They and they alone have made the lamentable Kidz Bop series a huge success and consequently are raising social retards who when they finally are "free" and off to college, will become drunken frat boys and/or slutty sorority girls.
They and they alone have made the lamentable Kidz Bop series a huge success and consequently are raising social retards who when they finally are "free" and off to college, will become drunken frat boys and/or slutty sorority girls.
The soccer moms of River Place subdivision gathered at Starbucks to discuss the growing problem of suspicious-looking Hispanic lawn crews prowling up and down their streets. Molly suggested that they discuss the issue with the HOA, to which Cindy said, "Good idea! Maybe we can make a rule requiring all Hispanics who come to our neighborhood be required to pass a background check."
They all loved this idea and toasted Cindy with their frozen lattes.
They all loved this idea and toasted Cindy with their frozen lattes.
by Tom Fool May 24, 2007
Middle to upper class white 30 to 45 year old moms that think every friggin thing is violent, except for their perfect little brats that they call children and their mini vans/elephant sized SUV's that use more gas than a plane going to Australia. Most of them are mind drones to their husbands who are the only provider of money seeing as none of them have jobs. They carry 100$ coffe, and a cell phone with them everywhere. And most of the time their vocal chords hurt from screaming their kids name at his or her soccer/baseball game 24/7. They want to censor everything that isn's christian, because its "evil." and feel only G rated movies and E rated video games are suitable for their bratty as hell kids. One of the most ignorant people around, because they think anything that isn't christian, white, and swear and or violence free is damed to hell.
"that soccer mom just cut me off in her gianst SUV cause she's late for her brat's soccer game, now i have a fender bender that she blamed on me"
by questionmarkc October 4, 2005
One of those moms you see in game stores who freaks the fuck out at managers for "polluting th minds of our youth". The soccer mom(read: bitch will commonly cut you off in traffic without warning, and then honk rapidly. On the back of her blue minivan/SUV there is ALWAYS a stupid generic soccer ball sticker. There are also about 2 to 3 stickers saying "my little fucker is an honor roll student at _____ Middle School."
In my local mall one day, I was just going into the music store to buy a new CD. I had my headphones on and was listening to my favorite band, Rammstein. A soccer mom(carrying PETA-endorsing stickers and pamphlets) approached me and yelled at me about my "Nazi pollution"(she could obviously hear it). I took my kickass German CD out and loaded it into one of the store's useable stereos, and turned the volume to the max. Bitch.
by Zwitterkrieger January 25, 2004
1.A middle to upper-class post-baby boomer woman, usually white, who usually spends her time homemaking. Her children are her whole world, and she considers them to be the exceptions to every rule. She cannot control them and expects everyone else to deal with that. She loves trendy diets and hair styles, is fashionably late to her children's sport practices, and insists that her children's teachers do not challenge them enough. Debate rages over her political leanings, but regardless, she feels that her and her family are moral soldiers, making sure that those who have "questionable" character are ignored, shunned, and avoided. She lives in the suburbs and drives an expensive SUV that her husband had lifted into the stratosphere, even though it will undoubtedly never be taken off-road once. Can frequently be seen standing in line in coffee shops and pays for a pack of gum with a debit card.
2.An object of sexual infatuation for many young men between 20 and 40.
2.An object of sexual infatuation for many young men between 20 and 40.
by Guinness for everything July 14, 2005