Today I want to talk about "Spanking the Monkey". The term is used as a euphemism for male masturbation. It is generally only used between close friends and not toward a person of authority. The history behind the phrase is a mystery, no one quite knows how it came to be. It does not have a direct relationship to the actual act. The phrase indicates that your penis is a monkey and that it has been very bad.
"Last night I spanked my monkey 8 times."
"If you keep spanking your monkey like that, you'll go blind and grow hair on your palms."
"If you keep spanking your monkey like that, you'll go blind and grow hair on your palms."
by Bob Homes March 3, 2006
There's an evil monkey in my closet.
by Eilidh May 10, 2004
by Dat one guy September 3, 2006
From monkey's arse. A more polite way of saying that you don't give a fuck/shit. Often used on television programmes shown before nine.
by Lalalaura July 19, 2005
When having sex with a woman, leave a creampie.
He then proceeds to scoop it out and throws it at her face.
This is not dissimilar to the way a monkey throws feces at its fellows.
He then proceeds to scoop it out and throws it at her face.
This is not dissimilar to the way a monkey throws feces at its fellows.
"Dude I wanna do the monkey sooo bad after Billy did it to Cindy."
"Yea man, Billy is the greatest."
"Yea man, Billy is the greatest."
by Brandywine Over the Moon September 25, 2008
A line spoken in Kong: Skull Island- where a helicopter pilot lays eyes on King Kong for the first time.
by Richard "Tricky Dick" Nixon May 25, 2017