Fat old teleporting man which breaks into houses via the chimney (who knows how in apartments), steals cookies and milk and leaves behind boxes wrapped in paper
by notarealperson111 December 07, 2020
A fat make-believe man that is very stupid and brain-washes all the kids to believe that he owns the North Pole and gives all kids presents on jesuses birthday and makes all the kids think about everything but jesus
by 223s908 December 03, 2019
When a married couple decide to spice up their love-making, they do the Santa Claus. This consists of the man sitting down in a Santa costume while the girl gets butt-sexed. She then proclaims, "I've been a naughty girl." and Santa says "I'm giving you a lump of coal this year." She then yells out "I'll give YOU a lump of coal!" and then proceeds to defecate on his penis.
Jeremy: "Let's spice up our sex life with the Santa Claus."
Korey: "Are you sure? We just ate Taco Bell..."
Jeremy: "Oh shit, let's do it on the tile then."
Keith: "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh shit. It's December 24th"
Vahid: "So what does that mean?"
Keith: "Santa Claus is coming to town tomorrow (winky face)"
Korey: "Are you sure? We just ate Taco Bell..."
Jeremy: "Oh shit, let's do it on the tile then."
Keith: "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh shit. It's December 24th"
Vahid: "So what does that mean?"
Keith: "Santa Claus is coming to town tomorrow (winky face)"
by JJ Dahmski November 24, 2010
Santa Claus is a creepy stalker who tries to make up for it by giving you gifts. He "sees you when you're sleeping, knows when you're awake, knows if you've been good or bad". See? Stalker. Not only that, but he knows where you live, your name, who you have a crush on, and everything else about you. Also rather stalkerish. Plus, he's a fatty. He must be what, 500 pounds? How does he fit through the chimney? And if you don't HAVE a chimney? He's also a greedy thief, as he steals your milk and cookies if you leave them. D: Another thing would be his signature laugh, "Ho ho ho!", which is hardly nice if you get what I'm saying. D: The bottom line: Santa Claus is a greedy thief, creepy, and a stalker.
by Breanna19 December 23, 2008
Most Known as *Hitler from Christmas* Santa Claus is a big fat dick elder, that sometimes acts kinda pedophile by eating his elf´s ass and pussy.
ELF - Heyooooo!!!! IT IS SANTA CLAUS EAT MY ASS SWOOOOWOOOO OUUWEEEEE.^
Santa - NEIN, GEHT AUF DIR BITCH!!!
Santa - NEIN, GEHT AUF DIR BITCH!!!
by Santa claus pedophile??? nein December 26, 2021
A shit excuse for your parents to eat cookies and drink wine, also it's just your dad smooching your mother not an overweight fat old man cheating on his wife.
by _NotEllis_ January 25, 2018
A person that likes to commit crimes like breaking and entering. Also has diabetes from how many fucking cookies he eats.
by Lilfam October 03, 2018