According to David Cross (an approximation):
SQUARE BAGELS! SQUARE FUCKING BAGELS! THIS IS THE NEW GENERATION'S BAGEL MAN. DON'T BE OPPRESSED BY THE TYRANNY OF ROUND! THAT'S FOR YOUR OLD MAN, MAN. LOOK AT HIM, HE DROPS HIS BAGEL AND IT ROLLS AWAY! BOO HOO! NOT ME, MAN, I DROP A SQUAGEL AND IT'S RIGHT FUCKING THERE MAN, IT'S RIGHT THERE! SO FUCK YOU MOTHER FUCK! FUCK YOU MOTHERRFUUCK!!!!!!!
Jim: Dude, I just had a squagel, it was pretty good.