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weyus's definitions

toxic waste dump

A bowel movement that stinks to high heaven, leaves streaks on the toilet porcelain, and in many cases, induces tears in anyone who comes near it. Anyone who comes in contact with it feels like it's an environmental disaster. Often the consistency of a chocolate soft serve ice cream.
Dan: What the fuck just happened in the shitter - it stinks like Love Canal?!? Wes - what did you do?
Wes: (sheeplishly grinning) I just took a toxic waste dump. Soary.
by weyus July 26, 2018
mugGet the toxic waste dumpmug.

Big Globe

The worldwide cabal of globe (and sometimes atlas and gazetteer) manufacturers that foments discord around the world in order to promote revolution and the creation of new national boundaries in order to promote sales of their products.
John: Did you hear about that revolution that started in southwest Namibia? You can guarantee that Big Globe is behind it. Of course, that's nothing like their crowning achievement, the dissolution of the Soviet Union.

Richard: Bastards.
by weyus July 27, 2016
mugGet the Big Globemug.

Tindersphere

The distance one is willing to travel in order to have a sexual liaison with someone they just matched with on Tinder.
John Adams: I just connected with this super hot Methodist. She is only two townships over and is still of childbearing age.

Ben Franklin: I hope you get to see 'neath her petticoat.

John Adams: Alas, my horse is lame and thus she is not within my Tindersphere.
by weyus August 28, 2016
mugGet the Tinderspheremug.

textegesis

1) Critical explanation or interpretation of a series of text messages in the hopes of constructing a coherent narrative from them.

2) The exegesis of text messages.
After Joe broke up with his girlfriend, he got hammered and texted her 25 times in 3 hours. The next morning, he had a significant bit of textegesis to do.
by weyus December 9, 2009
mugGet the textegesismug.

spam reunion

The reunion of two people that occurs because one of their online accounts has been compromised and sends spam to the other, resulting in the other to reply and reconnect to the first person.
Joe receives email advertising "Make your penis 20X larger with just one pill!" from an old acquaintance, Bob.
Joe replies to Bob: "Hey Bob - looks like your email got hacked. How have you been, man? The family is well, I hope? I just started a new job down in the valley - it's going pretty well. We should catch up over drinks sometime."
Bob replies: "Thanks for the heads up, Joe. I changed my email password. I'm excited to see you for a spam reunion."
by weyus September 25, 2013
mugGet the spam reunionmug.

cooter haulin'

The process whereby a woman uses her vagina to transport items (usually contraband). A female-only alternative to the prison wallet.
Mary: Hey Bob, here's that pot vape pen you wanted.
Bob: Thanks! But how did you get it past customs?
Mary: I did a bit of cooter haulin'.
Bob: (as he gingerly sets the pen down) Ummm, thanks?
by weyus July 26, 2018
mugGet the cooter haulin'mug.

shitfacetime

To use the iPhone 4's Facetime video calling feature whilst shitfaced.
I was out of town on a business trip, I got hammered one night and decided to shitfacetime my girlfriend and see if she would show me her tits.
by weyus August 5, 2010
mugGet the shitfacetimemug.

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