1) A guy who everybody thinks is badass but is in reality a total pansy.
2) Despite being a big, burly guy, but killed by the comparatively scrawny Bruce Lee
3) Thinks that Barack Obama is not eligible to be President because he wasn't born in the U.S., despite the fact that thorough investigations have proven otherwise and that his mother was a U.S. citizen, making Obama a U.S. citizen by birth.
4) Endorsed Mike Huckabee, aka the GOP's answer to Jimmy Carter for President in '08
1) Joe: Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer. Too bad he never cries.
Bob: You're wrong on both counts.
2) Bruce Lee: I KILL CHUCK NORRIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3) Chuck Norris: Barack Obama was born in Kenya, and therefore can't be president.
Constitutional Expert: Contrary to popular belief, one doesn't have to be born in the United States to be eligible for the Presidency, only a citizen by birth. Even if he was born in Kenya, his mother was a U.S. citizen, making him one by birth.
4) Chuck Norris: Hi I'm Chuck Norris, and I'd like you to vote for Mike Huckabee for President in 2008.
Intellectual: If Mike Huckabee's our next president, we're screwed.