me old fruity's definitions

did you shit the bed?

what you say to someone who turns up to work ridiculously early, as everyone knows this sort of eager beaver behaviour would only be acceptable if you had actually shat the bed, were forced to get out of it, and had nothing better to do than come to work.

colleague not due to start work till 9 showing up at 8.15: good morning!
me: did you shit the bed?!

by me old fruity October 1, 2006

turkey

1. An appallingly bad film, game, tv programme or other form of entertainment.
2. A person ignorant of the latest coolness.
3. An affectionate insult to use on family, friends and anyone you wish to baffle.
4. A rather amusing animal.
5. A country which is altogether too fond of knives.

1. 'Deep Impact' should have been a straight-to-video turkey.
2. You jive turkey!
3. Haha mom you're such a complete and utter turkey!
4. Turkey: Gobble Gobble
5. People from Turkey occasionally like to stab English football supporters.

by me old fruity June 11, 2006

fag

1. British Cigarette
2. Homosexual
3. Short for faggot, a bundle of wood, once used to burn homosexuals at the stake in less enlightened times, which is where the insult comes from.
4. What younger boys at private/boarding school are refferred to by their seniors. 'fags' have to do stupid jobs like warming toilet seats. Roald Dahl was one.

1. 13 yr old: giz us a fag
me: sod off

2. chav: 'haha, that man is wearing a pink shirt, which means he *must* be a fag!' (as clinically proven by the logical individuals at ChavLab©)

3. mad puritan: arr, get me some willowe faggots so i may burn this young scoundrel, so no man may know i am rather partial to a goode bumming myselfe'

4. 'FAG! go lick my shoes clean!'

by me old fruity September 5, 2005

go catch a fish

something snoop dogg used as an insult on doggy-fizzle televizzle, to much amusement.

go catch a fish!...bitch!

by me old fruity September 10, 2006

J-Kwon

whack-ass rapper from the dirrrrty south, famous for his song 'tipsy', can't pronouce words properly, aka 'chingy's retarded younger sibling'

J-Kwon: you dunt curr ima p.i.m.p!
translation 'you don't care that i'm a pimp'

by me old fruity July 31, 2006

gormless

someone who couldn't find their arse with both hands.

paris hilton, george w bush

by me old fruity August 29, 2005

Scouse key

a crowbar.

thats it!

I was a bit short on cash, so i helped myself to a dvd player from the house down the road, letting myself in with my scouse key.

by me old fruity May 23, 2006