Definitions by mattanaw

Falsepath

Alternative to being misdirected, or sent on a long worthless pathway with little or no reward at the end.

"I became a born-again and was a tattooed Christian for 20 years before I realized I was falsepathed. Now I'm on a truepath, I think."

"A huge number of people in History were falsepathed by their elders, parents and conquerors."

Falsepath by mattanaw July 22, 2021

Near-Deather 

Someone who is quite old or advanced in age enough to focus on their death more than their oldness.

To be used against old ageists and others who fail to progress mindsets.

"Don't listen to that near-deather, he doesn't know where or when he is."

"That neardeather over there is dragging me down."

"Those near deathers over their are watching their stocks again."

Near-Deather by mattanaw July 21, 2021

AGESPLAIN 

Older people who control conversations thinking they “know it all” without having any authority or justification like mansplainers.

“I had some rando granny agesplaining today I should find Christ.”

“That asshole agesplained to me for 20 minutes straight”

“Agesplain from afar, near deather!”

AGESPLAIN by mattanaw July 20, 2021

FOWN 

Creating a relationship or taking possession of another person with “fuck ownership”, “fuck owning”.

*pronounced: “Phone”, “Phoned”

“At first the were just hanging out now it’s fowned”

“He was FOWNed into marriage.”

“We have to recognize that people aren’t really bonded quite as often as they’re fowned. End fowning!”

FOWN by mattanaw July 20, 2021