19 definitions by m1z_w1z_11

Top Definition
A highly overated pyramid scheme in which, in exchange for four+ years of your life, you get financially raped by the school bookstore, tuition office, and the american educational system. And as a bonus you get a piece of paper called a 'Duh-Gree' which you pin to your shirt so potential employers will know why you are so stupid.
EMPLOYER: So why do want to work here?
EX-STUDENT: Because I went to college, and therefore I am entitled to a high paying job.
EMPLOYER: Of course. I think you will do well with us. Here is a corner cubicle where you'll spend the rest of your life complaining about why you never get a raise and dot.com dropouts are making more than you.
EX-STUDENT: Sounds great! The job world isn't so hard after all.
by m1z_w1z_11 September 01, 2005

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GPA
Overated system for determining a students intelligence but on occasion it does reflect a person's brain power. Designed primarily for parents and children with weak egos. Generally ignored by students with actual intelligence.
Mark: My GPA is 3.98, everyone will soon love and respect me.
Dave: (Punches Mark)
Mark: Um.....My GPA is only a general indicator of my ability to navigate the school system and irrelevant to my actual intelligence.
Dave: Your getting smarter everyday.
by m1z_w1z_11 August 29, 2005

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An overated institution in America that is supposed to educate young people 14-18 years old. At it's worst a dumping ground for parents who don't want to raise their own children. Students quickly forget how great it was after their first year in college or in the work world.
Jane: Hi. Longtime no see.
Mary: Hey. What's new?
Jane: Not much. Finishing college, getting married and working.
Mary: But how? You were never a cheer leader in highschool. I was Homecoming queen. How come no one pays attention to me anymore? Here look at my senior yearbook I was voted best personality.
Jane: Gotta run. Later.
by m1z_w1z_11 August 27, 2005

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A person who accepts the status quo because of fear and/or lack of conviction. They generally only act out of anger and by then it's to late. They live without beliefs other than the following- Go to school, get a job, make money, buy lots of crap, die. Frequently encountered in the American school system and the suburbs.
Steve: Do you think we should be in Iraq? Do you feel the war is right or wrong?
John: Hey the new Hummer is only going to be 36K! and it comes in yellow!
Steve: Should we devote more federal funds to conduct stem cell research?
John: Did you see American Idol last night?
Steve: Shouldn't we report that death threat letter we found at school today?
John: Huh? Were you speaking to me?
Steve: Never mind. Your such a Zombie.
John: (Groans. Starts chewing on Steve)
by m1z_w1z_11 August 27, 2005

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The end result of going through the American educational system.
Jack: I'm scared to think, can you decide things for me.
Gas Sation Attendant(GSA): Didn't you just graduate from college?
Jack: Yes I have a college duh-gree.
GSA: Ah, I see. Ok. You gave me $20...
Jack: Yeah, thats a twenty dollar bill, right?
GSA: ...and you put $16.50 on pump 11.
Jack: Stop. Just give me my change.
by m1z_w1z_11 August 27, 2005

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A horrible place of darkness and misery. Frequently mentioned by former AC/DC lead singer Bonn Scott. Generally equated with extreme heat or pain. Classically described as being populated by tormented sinners and filled with fire and brimstone. Biblically described as a place designed by God for the unrepentant who rejected Christ. Most people use the word casually or in a context that implies that it is a real place.
Mark: What the Hell is going on in here!
Mickey: I stepped on a nail and it hurts like Hell.
Mark: It's as hot as Hell in here.
Mickey: You look like Hell.
Mark: Your funny as Hell.
Mickey: How about some AC/DC to help my pain.
Mark: Go to Hell.
by m1z_w1z_11 September 12, 2005

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SUV
SUV stands for Sport-Utility-Vehicle but can also be read as: Super Ugly Vehicle, Stupid Useless Vehicle, Sport Useless Vehicle, Super Useless Vehicle, Sucky Useless Vehicle, or Seriously Ugly Vehicle. Most SUV's sit in the garage and never go off road unless one of their tires blows out. They are an extra heavy, environmentally hostile, overpriced status symbol with poor gas mileage, high repair costs, and a history of rolling over. Driven mostly by the same Baby Boomers who brought us bell bottoms and disco. They are viewed by some psychologists as a Freudian expression of insecurity and lack of sexual endowment. People hit by SUV's usually die instantly. Some analysts predict the death of the SUV fad/craze to be 2006.
Bill: Hey look at my new SUV, it weighs six tons, is 20 feet long, gets 4 miles to the gallon, and has never seen a dirt road.
John: What do you need it for?
Bill: I feel insecure and the commercials looked exciting. Hey would you like to see an old pair of my bell bottoms?
John: No thanks, me and my wife are taking our new hybrid cross country to go camping.
Bill: Well have a good time, I'm taking out a loan to buy some gas to drive to work this month.
by m1z_w1z_11 August 28, 2005

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