18 definitions by m1z_w1z_11
Someone to be pitied. A lost soul perpetually waiting for the arrival of a once in a millenium alignment of good management, coaching, and injury/error free players. A person duped by a wonderful ballpark and team owners into accepting consecutive seasons of failure. A drain on Chicagos economy because they waste so much time, energy, and money going to day games.
Boss: Where's Mark?
Bob: He went to the Cubs game last night.
Boss: He's a Cubs Fan? Oh, well I guess I'll be getting nothing out him during baseball season.
Bob: I'm going to a WhiteSox game this weekend.
Boss: That's great. Take Friday off if you want since your ahead on your work anyway.
Bob: He went to the Cubs game last night.
Boss: He's a Cubs Fan? Oh, well I guess I'll be getting nothing out him during baseball season.
Bob: I'm going to a WhiteSox game this weekend.
Boss: That's great. Take Friday off if you want since your ahead on your work anyway.
by m1z_w1z_11 August 30, 2005
SUV stands for Sport-Utility-Vehicle but can also be read as: Super Ugly Vehicle, Stupid Useless Vehicle, Sport Useless Vehicle, Super Useless Vehicle, Sucky Useless Vehicle, or Seriously Ugly Vehicle. Most SUV's sit in the garage and never go off road unless one of their tires blows out. They are an extra heavy, environmentally hostile, overpriced status symbol with poor gas mileage, high repair costs, and a history of rolling over. Driven mostly by the same Baby Boomers who brought us bell bottoms and disco. They are viewed by some psychologists as a Freudian expression of insecurity and lack of sexual endowment. People hit by SUV's usually die instantly. Some analysts predict the death of the SUV fad/craze to be 2006.
Bill: Hey look at my new SUV, it weighs six tons, is 20 feet long, gets 4 miles to the gallon, and has never seen a dirt road.
John: What do you need it for?
Bill: I feel insecure and the commercials looked exciting. Hey would you like to see an old pair of my bell bottoms?
John: No thanks, me and my wife are taking our new hybrid cross country to go camping.
Bill: Well have a good time, I'm taking out a loan to buy some gas to drive to work this month.
John: What do you need it for?
Bill: I feel insecure and the commercials looked exciting. Hey would you like to see an old pair of my bell bottoms?
John: No thanks, me and my wife are taking our new hybrid cross country to go camping.
Bill: Well have a good time, I'm taking out a loan to buy some gas to drive to work this month.
by m1z_w1z_11 August 29, 2005
The feeling one gets after all the parental hype of your life gets swept away by reality. Usually after hichschool when you are no longer the most popular and the only college to accept you is Lost Dog Community College or Drunken State Univ. Also experienced after college when you realize- you are not going to be drafted by a pro sports team, no one cares where you graduated from, and your loans total 85K and your job pays 26K a year.
Mark: What's up. Haven't seen you since highschool. Did you finish Harvard?
John: I never got accepted. I'm going to DSU.
Mark: Oh. Still shooting for the NFL?
John: I got a busted knee. I'm majoring in business now.
Mark: Wow, sounds tough. Your parents are still proud though. You won state in highschool and that'll last forever.
John: I'm gonna go, I don't feel so hot.
Mark: It's ok your experiencing deflation.
John: I never got accepted. I'm going to DSU.
Mark: Oh. Still shooting for the NFL?
John: I got a busted knee. I'm majoring in business now.
Mark: Wow, sounds tough. Your parents are still proud though. You won state in highschool and that'll last forever.
John: I'm gonna go, I don't feel so hot.
Mark: It's ok your experiencing deflation.
by m1z_w1z_11 August 28, 2005
An overated institution in America that is supposed to educate young people 14-18 years old. At it's worst a dumping ground for parents who don't want to raise their own children. Students quickly forget how great it was after their first year in college or in the work world.
Jane: Hi. Longtime no see.
Mary: Hey. What's new?
Jane: Not much. Finishing college, getting married and working.
Mary: But how? You were never a cheer leader in highschool. I was Homecoming queen. How come no one pays attention to me anymore? Here look at my senior yearbook I was voted best personality.
Jane: Gotta run. Later.
Mary: Hey. What's new?
Jane: Not much. Finishing college, getting married and working.
Mary: But how? You were never a cheer leader in highschool. I was Homecoming queen. How come no one pays attention to me anymore? Here look at my senior yearbook I was voted best personality.
Jane: Gotta run. Later.
by m1z_w1z_11 August 28, 2005
An adaptation of John Bradshaws theory of 'Inner Child'. Basically it means everyone has an Inner Thug that wants to get out. It sometimes expresses itself through a fascination with Hip Hop and Grand Theft Auto. Simply another term to describe the uncivilized part of our natures and the desire to be lawless.
John: I'm going to cap his ass!
Dave: Your white, your not going to do anything.
John: Your right. That was my inner thug talking.
Dave: Let's go play GTA.
John: Cool.
Dave: Your white, your not going to do anything.
John: Your right. That was my inner thug talking.
Dave: Let's go play GTA.
John: Cool.
by m1z_w1z_11 September 2, 2005
Awsome idea that is slowly being overwhelmed by morons who insist on making up complete bullshit words about sex, their boy/girl friend, and every low IQ insight that pops into their minds. Hopefully the book version will weed out all the bullshit.
Dan: Hey I just took a big fucking dump!!
John: Really. Hmmmm. Hey that could be a word!
Dan: Huh?
John: How about.....you just took a Bif-dump!
Dan: Dude, submit it to a slang dictionary like www.Urbandictionary.com
John: Yeah. Ok. I'll do it.
John: Really. Hmmmm. Hey that could be a word!
Dan: Huh?
John: How about.....you just took a Bif-dump!
Dan: Dude, submit it to a slang dictionary like www.Urbandictionary.com
John: Yeah. Ok. I'll do it.
by m1z_w1z_11 September 4, 2005
A highly overated pyramid scheme in which, in exchange for four+ years of your life, you get financially raped by the school bookstore, tuition office, and the american educational system. And as a bonus you get a piece of paper called a 'Duh-Gree' which you pin to your shirt so potential employers will know why you are so stupid.
EMPLOYER: So why do want to work here?
EX-STUDENT: Because I went to college, and therefore I am entitled to a high paying job.
EMPLOYER: Of course. I think you will do well with us. Here is a corner cubicle where you'll spend the rest of your life complaining about why you never get a raise and dot.com dropouts are making more than you.
EX-STUDENT: Sounds great! The job world isn't so hard after all.
EX-STUDENT: Because I went to college, and therefore I am entitled to a high paying job.
EMPLOYER: Of course. I think you will do well with us. Here is a corner cubicle where you'll spend the rest of your life complaining about why you never get a raise and dot.com dropouts are making more than you.
EX-STUDENT: Sounds great! The job world isn't so hard after all.
by m1z_w1z_11 September 2, 2005