iceman 69's definitions

Human Hamster Wheel

A Human Hamster Wheel is any exercise device used by humans that simulates a strenuous activity. The human mounts the device and peddles, strides, rows or pumps their way to nowhere like a hamster on a wheel. The stair-master is the most obvious example of a human hamster wheel. Exercise bikes, rowing machines and abdominal rollers are also good examples. Humans all over the planet can be seen in 24 hour gyms, at ungodly hours of the night, sweating away on their human hamster wheels, as if in a trance.

"I just got a stair-master 3000. I'm gonna get pumped up!" "Oh, you got yourself a human hamster wheel."

"I left the club at 2:30 am and walked past a 24 hour gym. There were at least 20 people on human hamster wheels."

by iceman 69 January 10, 2010

satanistic

Eminem's clever variation of the word "satanic" as found in the song Bad Influence. "My basic disk will make you take a razor to your wrist. Make you satanistic. Make you take the pistol to your face..."

If you're Eminem and need to half hazardly incorporate a rhyme with "wrist", just make up a word like "satanistic".

by iceman 69 March 11, 2011

Boss

Noun; Word used by sport-fisherman to describe an enormous catch. A boss fish is usually at the top of the food-chain, meaning that there is no other fish in the area that would dare contend with it. When a fish slams on an angler's line and it is clear that the animal is not an ordinary fish, it is obvious that the fish is a boss. On occasion, the fish comes in slowly and it is unclear whether or not the fish is a boss. Once the fish is actually witnesses, it can be determined if it is a boss.

If your line gets slammed by a fish and it is instantly clear that it's a monster, you can vocally declare, "Hell yea! It's a boss!" This can be assigned to any species as long as the animal is extraordinarily large for it's species. Example: Boss-Bass, Boss-Pike, Boss-Walleye, etc.

by iceman 69 December 28, 2009

Unphasable

Unphasable is a condition where nothing can harm you. It is a mental state on omnipotence where an individual cannot be phased and is almost God-like. Someone that is Unphasable can perform any task known to man with ease.

Tony Montana was so pumped up with cocaine that he was pretty much Unphasable to heavy machine-gun fire.

Dr. Manhattan from the comic-film The Watchmen is clearly Unphasable.

Bill Gates's finances are Unphasable, even in the hardest economy.

by iceman 69 January 5, 2010

Beard Of Lincoln

Noun; A beard made of pubic hair and secured to the person's face by semen. The Beard of Lincoln is "given" by a man that ejaculates on their sexual partner's chin and cheeks, then rips a handful of his (or their) pubic hair and sprinkles the hair onto the semen. The semen secures the pubic hair to their face and resembles a beard.

"I busted my load on her chin, ripped out a handful of my pubic hair and threw it on the load." You would reply, "Oh man, you gave her the Beard of Lincoln."

by iceman 69 December 23, 2009

fuseball

A condition in which a man's scrotum fuses to his inner thigh due to high humidity or sticky environments.

Not only did I have a horrible case of swampass but I was experiencing fuseball as well.

I forgot to apply baby powder to my nuts before I went jogging and now I have a case of fuseball.

by iceman 69 July 18, 2010

junkmail

Armor constructed from newspapers, department-store advertisements, cardboard, phonebooks or any type of junk that can be found in the mailbox. The purpose of junkmail is the same as for chainmail, that is to stop knives and shanks from piercing organs. Prisoners all over the world have used junkmail for as long as paper products have been in circulation. Ideally, junkmail should cover the chest, abdomen and sternum, being at least 2 inches thick. Junkmail is light weight, easy to forge and practical for use in any prison gang-war. It is called junkmail because it is constructed from junk and can be disposed of easily.

The prisoner survived the violent rival gang hit, only because of the junkmail he was wearing.

by iceman 69 December 29, 2009