The plural term for the Newcastle 'charva', usually the name given to the swine-hordes of morons who make up approximately one half of the native Newcastle population. Their numbers are maintained by the inbreeding of charvae at approx 14 years old, which results in accidental pregnancy and produces the next generation of unwanted children. The prospects of being taught to use their brains, be educated, make a contribution to history, earn money, learn a trade or possess self-esteem are woefully low and means that we all feel sorry for charva under-fives. If they reach 14, then the cycle will repeat itself.
Charvae are distinct even when naked, because of their gaunt appearance and the look of borrowed flesh, hanging loose from their bones due to their peculiar dietary habits which leads them to malnourishment. The charva food-cupboard
comprises tinned hot-dogs, baked beans, pasta'n'sauce (for the posher ones)and may even stretch to a packet of dairylea, all bought in mountainous bulk on giro day from Netto (or maybe Morrisons if they're walking home.) White cider is the chosen beverage, which is taken several times a day at intervals, with class B drugs. Celebratory splash-out meals are had from time to time, when charvae 'get raj' at McDonalds.
Despite being pathetic, doomed losers and non-achievers, creatures that we all wish to help, charvae do have value, as they are walking, breathing examples of the importance of birth control.
A male Newcastle charva's word for their penis. One of the better words to come out of their shan lexicon. Has been adopted by the gay community, too, much to the grief of charvae who will now have to think of a new word.
'Suck me cheb'
Derived from the two words 'charva
harmer', this is a Newcastle gay man who shows his affection for charvas when they bother him by beating them to a pulp, rather than just laughing at them in a hysterical and sypmathetic manner. A cause of much embarrassment to charvae, this phenomenon is known to the charvae themsleves as a 'tough puff'. Losing in a fight to a charmer is the ultimate social death among charvae, who will reject and stigmatise the loser. Charmers have also been known to play the charva game of roaming the streets of the west end and jumping on lone charvae and giving them a damn good lamping, though this is a rare phenomenon. Charvae actually have a respect for 'hard puffs' and know not to start a fight with them, knowing that their own strength and skills are inferior, which will lead them to lose badly and become a laughing stock. Charmers often wear skatewear, off-centre Goth wear and occasionally adopt the look of a classic skinhead yob. They have a great respect for most people, but are feared by charvae
'Jesus av just had me nose brokken by a puff, divn't tell any o me mates. A proper charmer....'