colin cummerbund's definitions
A variety of spanking indulged in by arty types. The spankee coats his arse with oil paints of many colours and bends over a sculpture of Shakespeare. The spanker then larrups the spankees paint-smeared buttocks with a palette or rolled-up canvas. The gleeful yelpings of the spankees are often recorded and sold in art shops as "Sounds to inspire you".
That fellow with the easel has quite a limp. Aubrey.
Yes. I think you'll find he's been the spankee in some Briggsy spanking.
Yes. I think you'll find he's been the spankee in some Briggsy spanking.
by Colin Cummerbund September 21, 2006
Get the Briggsy spanking mug.A homosexual act in which two men stand facing each other and roll the same rubber onto both erect cocks. They then violently agitate the rubber-encased twin saveloy until both queens have emptied their sacks. Named after Briggsy, the famous art guy and co-author of The Joy of Gay Sex.
by Colin Cummerbund September 14, 2006
Get the Double Briggsy mug.A hearty meal served in gay bars. Usually consists of a lump of mature nob cheese with arse pickle, thickly-sliced bread and pork pie with semen relish. Regional variations can include a rats-cock side dish with diarrhoea drizzle.
Come on Quentin, let's go to The Pink Dildo for a Briggsy Ploughman's. I'm bloody starving after that rimming session.
by Colin Cummerbund September 18, 2006
Get the Briggsy Ploughman's mug.A type of Brothel worked by only the oldest, ugliest and most disease-riddled prostitutes. These women can't do business with regular clients as they are so repulsive no one would pay for them. Instead they are condemned to a Briggsy Brothel where only the oldest, ugliest and most disease-riddled clients go. Regular prostitutes won't do business with these clients as they are so repellant. Thus the Briggsy Brothel matches up hideous hookers with repulsive johns. The BB is such a niche profession that the hookers are frequently idle. These disused prostitutional wastes pass the time by exchanging treasured possessions such as genital warts and fanny slugs.
by Colin Cummerbund September 8, 2006
Get the Briggsy Brothel mug.Otherwise known as Briggsy's Gay Mafia. A bunch of pretentious artists who punish the non-arty. They march through cities and verbally abuse anyone who dares to walk past an art gallery without going in and jizzing their pants in artistic excitement. Briggsy's Art Police is made up of all the artists who have been anally pleasured by Briggsy and who worship the dwarf as their god.
Better not walk past Tate Modern without going in. Briggsy's Art Police will be patrolling and I don't fancy being harangued by a gaggle of mincing queers.
by Colin Cummerbund September 18, 2006
Get the Briggsy's Art Police mug.Briggsy: Why pay for vaseline when my beautiful face produces copious amounts of Briggsy's Special Lube free of charge?
by Colin Cummerbund October 18, 2006
Get the Briggsy's Special Lube mug.Who's that?
That's Fenton, the new boss.
But he's got a non-regulation head-shape.
Haven't they all?
That's Fenton, the new boss.
But he's got a non-regulation head-shape.
Haven't they all?
by Colin Cummerbund September 20, 2006
Get the Non-regulation head-shape mug.