cokemidget's definitions

Lancer

A type of car produced by Japanese manufacturer Mitsubishi. Lancers are usually driven by some 24 year old white guy with a sideways hat who is blasting his Tupac CD, who also doesn't realize Tupac stopped being cool about six years ago and the sideways hat makes him look like a bell-end. The driver was most likely duped into thinking he bought a sports car, so he will usually rev his engine to try and race you, but his car can't outrun my 2002 four door civic dx, or my six year old sister who is crippled, deaf, and retarded.

Is that Derwitt's new car? Is that a Lex? Oh wait, it's just a lancer.

by cokemidget June 28, 2008

Rob Fording

The act of getting all wasted and doing crack.

Guy 1: Man, you were out of control last night.
Guy 2: Yeah, I was Rob Fording it pretty hard.

by cokemidget November 10, 2013

Skittlepox

A contagious rash similar to chicken pox, but with edible skittles appearing on a person's body. Popularized in a 2013 Skittles commercial.

Baby, I've got something to tell you. I have skittlepox...on my dick.

Is it contagious?

Just keep sucking it, bitch.

by cokemidget December 16, 2013

workers comp hustle

The act of deliberately injuring yourself on the job to collect workers' compensation insurance. The phrase was immortalized in the Canadian classic movie Fubar 2, when Deaner broke his leg with a 60lb pipeline beam in order to collect some WCB.

I just can't take it up here in the Ft. Mac oilfields. The work is hard, the hours are long, and the job sucks. Time for the workers comp hustle.

by cokemidget May 23, 2018

Stabcident

An incident where someone is stabbed.

Hey Scott... don’t let this knife fight end with a you in a hospital because of an unexpected stabcident

by cokemidget November 3, 2020

Carbage diet

A diet in which you can eat all the carbs you want as long as you find them in the trash.

Hey, I saw you digging in the garbage at work. Are you poor?

Not poor, just trying this new carbage diet.

by cokemidget November 3, 2020

planned hammer

Basically a pre-scheduled bender. It's a result of turning 30 and having to plan your hangovers around other obligations like your job or your kids.

Sarah: Hey Kimmy, can you take my morning shift at IHOP on Sunday? I have to go to church that morning.

Kimmy: I'd love to, but I have a planned hammer on Saturday. I'm going to a kegger at Lorenzo's house, and i plan on getting white girl wasted.

Sarah: Can I come?

Kimmie: No way churchie.

by cokemidget March 31, 2017