cokemidget's definitions

The Night of Conky

A night where your friend shows up at your house, gets all drunk, and starts talking like Conky from Trailer Park Boys. He/she might also whip out a miniature Conky puppet to add to the effect.

Rachelle: Ravvviiiinnneee.
Colin: Hey Rachelle, how much have you have to drink tonight?
Rachelle: I don't know, stuuupiiid.
Fannie: Somebody take that puppet away from her. It's really pissing me off.
Andrzej: It's The Night of Conky!

by cokemidget August 14, 2009

planned hammer

Basically a pre-scheduled bender. It's a result of turning 30 and having to plan your hangovers around other obligations like your job or your kids.

Sarah: Hey Kimmy, can you take my morning shift at IHOP on Sunday? I have to go to church that morning.

Kimmy: I'd love to, but I have a planned hammer on Saturday. I'm going to a kegger at Lorenzo's house, and i plan on getting white girl wasted.

Sarah: Can I come?

Kimmie: No way churchie.

by cokemidget March 31, 2017

nickles

A drinking/campfire game in which the participant throws a 5 cent coin over the fence in order to hit a neighbouring house, shed, car, or any other object. The winner is judged by the length of time the nickel takes to hit something, as well as the loudness of the sound the coin makes. The game is best played after sundown, and bonus points are awarded when the owner of the house being hit turns on the lights to see what the noise was all about.

This game can also be played with other denominations such as quarters, but nickles are usually picked for both their relatively large size as well as their low value, providing the best bang for the buck.

"Hey, what do you chumps want to do tonight?"

"Let's get really drunk and play nickles".

by cokemidget January 3, 2008

Argo

A word meant to indicate a quick escape. Could be used as a verb or a noun.

Person 1: I totally can't afford this bar tab.

Person 2: Time to argo out of here?
Person 1: Time to argo THE FUCK out of here .

by Cokemidget April 9, 2022

economy leech

An individual who leaves one region to profit from the economic prosperity of another region. Generally, economy leeches have no marketable skills and and therefore contribute very little to the well being of their new environment. They arrive in droves and their presence usually results in a steep increase in rent prices. Economy leeches usually appear disoriented in traffic, and can be identified by their out-of-province license plates and their constant whining about social problems, which they themselves have caused.

In Alberta, economy leeches are sometimes called Buffalo Hunters, in reference to the 19th European settlers who raped and pillaged the bison population of the prairie provinces for their precious hides.

I was totally late to work today. I was driving behind some newfie economy leech who drove 20 under the limit because he didn't know where he was going.

by cokemidget January 15, 2008

filipino gene

A gene carried by certain individuals which causes massive intoxication from minute amounts of alcohol. This recessive gene is predominantly seen in the Filipino community, hence the name.

"Hey what's wrong with Luiz? He just got here and he's already smashed."

"Don't worry about him; that's just the Filipino gene at work."

by cokemidget January 10, 2008

Jetta

A small, family sedan built by German car manufacturer Volkswagen. Jettas are pretty nice, but tend to break down after a couple of years of driving. They are usually purchased by yuppies, homosexuals, and suburban tourists who have money, but not too much money. For this reason, people sometimes refer to the Jetta as the poor man's BMW.

Look at that douchebag driving his Jetta. Who the hell does he think he is? Oh, look he has a passenger, and it's another dude... surprise, surprise...

by cokemidget June 28, 2008