(acronym) Entertainment and SEC Sports Programming Network.
A series of sports networks that claims to have no bias but show exceedingly increased bias toward the Southeastern Conference for their "superiority", namely in college football. To this day, fans have not seen the currently unsurpassed levels of ass-kissery from the ESECPN sportscasters.
Also known as E$PN, ESPIN, and the archaic ESPN.
I turned on ESECPN the other day, and what do you know...they're broadcasting Kentucky vs. Mississippi State instead of #1 USC vs. #2 Michigan.
Similar to Tebowing, Teoing is posing with your arm around your imaginary girlfriend's shoulder, just like Manti Te'o did many a lone night by himself (with a large Samoan man on the other end of the internets).
When I ordered dinner for two and had a conversation with the empty seat next to me, people thought I was insane. Truth is, I was just Teoing
In NCAA football, to get "Glennoned" is to have your team's undefeated season come crashing down at the hands of a mediocre team, led by a mediocre QB, and one of the only ACC quarterbacks not to transfer to Wisconsin - Mike Glennon.
The resulting defeat crushes your hopes of making it to the BCS title game (but let's face it, the $EC has to be in it regardless) and makes every other win seem insignificant, especially as NC State has a mediocre rest of the season.
Getting Glennoned on the ESPN website is referred to as getting gleasted.
EJ Manuel was hot on the Heisman list until he got Glennoned at Carter-Finley Stadium in Raleigh.
The language resulting from heavily relying on Siri to become your translator, often resulting in incomprehensible or nonsensical sentences that resemble poorly translated Chinese. Named for the Wukan village in China.
I tried to tell my roommate that "I left my window open" by using Siri to text, but it turned into the Wukanese "I leaned my wang over".
The three-headed monster consisting of Virginia Tech QB coach Mike O'Cain, offensive coordinator Bryan Stinespring, and O-line coach Curt Newsome. Together they combine into a drastically-underachieving force to continue to make Hokies football decline.
Logan Thomas' success last season was soon forgotten, as O'Cainspringsome's playcalling in 2012 left him underutilized, underprotected, and left out to dry, requiring him to return for a senior season to put him higher on the draft boards.
In NCAA Division I football (FBS), the "BCS paradox" occurs when a conference simultaneously wins and loses the BCS National Championship game. Despite not winning the conference division and playing one less game while the other team competes for the conference championship, the 2nd-in-division team still competes for the MNC (Mythical National Champion) title.
The resulting game is 100% guaranteed to top any previous games labeled as "The Game of the Century", and ensures that the record of "Most Viewers Falling Asleep" will be shattered.
Note that the "BCS paradox" only applies to the $EC, because no other conference can bring in the same amount of money...er, produce the two greatest teams in the nation.
Despite losing the snoozefest against LSU in the regular season, Alabama's week of rest (while LSU was battling Georgia for the conference title) paid off as the Crimson Tide beat the Tigers in the most boring game in the history of football. The fact that the SEC both won and lost the BCS National Championship resulted in the first-ever "BCS paradox".
The go-to diet of families during a winter storm. For whatever reason, as soon as there's going to be ice or snow, people stop buying regular food and immediately run to the store to purchase every last bit of milk and bread. One can only assume they're going to make milk sandwiches.
I went to the grocery store today to get some bread, but the whole shelf - along with the milk aisle - were empty. I suppose some families will be dining on milk sandwiches for the next week.