brucester's definitions
You have just arrived home late and have furtively drilled your new girlfriend on the living room floor of her house whilst the rest of the family are asleep upstairs. The kettle is on and she has crept upstairs to the bathroom to have a piss and muck out her meat wallet. You are desperate to dry your cock......the kitchen is tidy, even you wouldn't use a tea towell!! no kitchen roll handy and no downstairs loo......It HAS to be a zaffle with the back of the living room curtains.
by Brucester September 1, 2006

hwank or hwankers. Invented by Tourettes sufferer Pete Bennett of Big Brother 7 fame. Word is identical to wank or wankers but is intentionally poorly disguised by a cough, thus absolving the user of any responsibility for using an expletive.
"Grace is getting booed, they're booing Grace - hwankers"
Using the word 'wankers' he would have been insulting the people he wanted to vote for him, but 'hwankers' - no problem.
Using the word 'wankers' he would have been insulting the people he wanted to vote for him, but 'hwankers' - no problem.
by Brucester September 1, 2006
