29 definitions by Tuftskins
Someone who leaves a turd behind in a toilet, usually public. Usually, this "gift" is well wrapped with toilet paper and so large that the toilet cannot be flushed safely.
Like Santa Claus, Shit Santa is legendary and never seen. Unlike Santa Claus, Shit Santa operates 365 days a year, and no one looks forward to his visits.
Like Santa Claus, Shit Santa is legendary and never seen. Unlike Santa Claus, Shit Santa operates 365 days a year, and no one looks forward to his visits.
by Tuftskins April 30, 2009
An erection. One does not have to be wearing Levi's when stating thus, or even own a pair. It just sounds cool to say it.
But if you are wearing purple corduroy's while you use this line, someone is likely to make fun of you.
But if you are wearing purple corduroy's while you use this line, someone is likely to make fun of you.
by Tuftskins May 2, 2009
A loser who mooches off of others until his/her times runs out. See also "couch surfer". Butt pickers lack any sort of motivation. Some are sociopaths, true users, but most are lazy indolent types who seek out helping hands to screw over. Get a life, butt pickers.
Although he was a talented carpenter, Johnny was too lazy to find a steady job, and instead chose to lounge around as a butt picker, watching the TV and eating the food of whoever bought his sorry stories.
by Tuftskins May 22, 2010
A bar whose inhabitants are almost entirely male. Sausage saloons differ from gay bars in that the clientele is straight; mostly working stiffs and pensioners enjoying a cold one. Not bad places to hang out, but don't go there looking to score chicks.
Moe's Tavern would be a classic example.
Moe's Tavern would be a classic example.
Dan: "Damn, that 90-year old barmaid is the only chick in here!"
Tony: "Yeah, this is a sausage saloon. Let's finish our beers and check out the action at that place down the street."
Tony: "Yeah, this is a sausage saloon. Let's finish our beers and check out the action at that place down the street."
by Tuftskins December 9, 2009
A public restroom phenomenon in which the turd dumper needs complete privacy in order to do their thing. The presence of another person in the adjacent stall, or even the restroom, will cause sphincters to pucker to less than a 1 cm.
This is especially true if the turd dumper knows he/she is going to have an embarrassing explosive turd, complete with lots of gas and splashing sounds.
Two persons with turd insecurity in adjacent stalls results in a very uncomfortable , time consuming experience for both. A solution is to flush the toilet in sync with dumping the turd, hopefully masking the dump.
This is especially true if the turd dumper knows he/she is going to have an embarrassing explosive turd, complete with lots of gas and splashing sounds.
Two persons with turd insecurity in adjacent stalls results in a very uncomfortable , time consuming experience for both. A solution is to flush the toilet in sync with dumping the turd, hopefully masking the dump.
His sphincter tight with turd insecurity, Steve hoped the person in the next stall would leave. In the next stall, Mark harbored the same hopes.
by Tuftskins April 30, 2009
A very noisy, irritating dog which barks incessantly, usually during hours when Dracula stalks, for any or no reason.
If that barkbag doesn't shut up, I'm calling the cops!
by Tuftskins May 1, 2009
Hot Tamales candy or the generic version thereof. Used by stoners to mask the smell of their pot breath, and to alleviate the munchies at the same time.
Bob: Do you think mom will smell the marijuana on my breath?
Mike: I don't know man, better take some Mexican breath mints to be safe.
Mike: I don't know man, better take some Mexican breath mints to be safe.
by Tuftskins May 3, 2009