3 definitions by TheFurnitureGal

Top Definition
Sucks up all your time asking pointless question and also never purchases furniture.
Susan helpped out one of the worse Furniture Vampires because she spend 4 hours with them and they decided they wouldn't buy the sofa they liked.
by TheFurnitureGal March 11, 2011
When a customer comes into a furniture store multiple times throughout the week and walks around looking at the same things without asking any questions or for help; in a zombie like manner. Furniture Zombies also never buy and waste your time. This is similar to a Furniture Vampire but a Furniture Zombie doesn’t speak or acknowledge that a sales person is even there. A Furniture Zombie episode could last 20 seconds to 2 hours. The typical age of a Furniture Zombie is the ages 70 and up. At least 1 out of 10 customers is considered a Furniture Zombie. If a Furniture Zombie is under the age of 70 then you have a rare form of Furniture Zombie which might be better or worse than a typical Furniture Zombie.
Susan had a classic Furniture Zombie. The woman was 80 years old and she was previously in the past two days looking at all of the furniture pieces on the floor. Susan asked her if she could help but the woman didn't respond and looked like a zombie.
by TheFurnitureGal April 08, 2011
A furniture orgasm is when a sales person gets an orgasm from new furniture and/or new fabrics that they receive from furniture manufactures.
Susan and Brendon both had furniture orgasms when they saw the new furniture and fabric that was going to be put on the showroom floor.
by TheFurnitureGal April 29, 2011

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