23 definitions by The Jax
When a poor Jewish family celebrates Hanukkah yet does not have any money to provide gifts for each other. In this instance a selfgift is proclaimed, allowing another member of their immediate family to have consensual heterosexual sexual intercourse with them, thus satisfying the gift requirement. Sometimes father and daughter or brother and sister selfgifts will be given in this instance as long as both gifters are at least adolescent age. In the case that there are pre-adolescents in the family, the father and mother have sexual intercourse in front of their children, thus gifting to them to a show of lovemaking.
My mom and dad lost their jobs due to downsizing and the economy is terrible. This Hanukkah we did not have any money to buy gifts for each other. My sister offered a Hanukkah Poverty Selfgift. It wasn't right but she offered so I screwed her brains out. My parents were understanding of the situation since she didn't have a gift. I will never tell the guys in school about it though.
by The Jax August 5, 2009
When a client of a workers comp attorney is rightfully injured from his job yet the insurance company stops sending him checks claiming there is an overpayment. After several months of not receiving check and not allowed to work, the client goes broke. This situation is called by this name because the attorney fooled the client into thinking they were handling the matter and that the client will be getting a check. When the client runs out of money, the attorney shows little remorse on the matter nor suggests any alternatives other then go apply for welfare.
I was on workers comp and they stopped sending me check claiming they overpaid me. Two months went by and I still didn't have a check. I got thrown out of my apartment and I had to turn in the plates on my car because I couldn't pay my car insurance. I totally got Workers Comp Punk'd !!!
by The Jax August 7, 2009
When a man gives hints, requests, orders, or complains for women in his home and work life to dress like a secretary, such as Jenna Fischers character on hit TV Show "The Office". The reason for this is for the man to find it attractive yet he is merely a voyeur and it rarely leads to sex.
In some cases it can lead to break ups, seperations, and divorces in home life situations where a wife a girlfriend will continuely not comply with the mans request. In a work environment, it can also lead to sexual harrassment.
In some cases it can lead to break ups, seperations, and divorces in home life situations where a wife a girlfriend will continuely not comply with the mans request. In a work environment, it can also lead to sexual harrassment.
My boss at work has made it mandatory that all women in the office dress professionally requiring a professional secretary type clothing. We think he has Jenna Fischer Syndrome as I know he is obsessed with "The Office" and has a picture of her on his wall. This ain't the Micheal Scott Paper Company ya know!
by The Jax April 26, 2009
When a girl or woman has feet where her bone structure, skin tone, nail placement, and skin texture are so close to perfect that a majority of people who are attracted to female feet will consider her feet more attractive then anything else they ever seen.
A girl I work with is always playing with her shoes under her desk. One day I walked by and she had them off. I couldn't help but stop and look. I could not believe she had Golden Toes. I have never seen feet so beautiful. Some girls have busted feet or they are so-so. But her feet are so amazing.
by The Jax August 5, 2009
When an individual drinks certain things, like juice, so they have to go to the bathroom to poop. That individual, begins to hold it while waiting in their neighbor's driveway while their neighbor is not home. When the neighbor is coming down the street in their car, the individual drops their pants and squats with their butt facing the street. As the neighbor tries to pull in the driveway, the individual deficates publicly on the driveway in front of the neighbor and whoever else is watching, then pulls up their pants, and walks back to their house, never looking back.
My neighbor has these barking dogs they let out all hours of the night as well as their teenage sons with their loud exausts and boom boxes. I decided use to their driveway as a Neighborly Driveway Toilet and I think they got the point.
by The Jax April 25, 2007
A girl casted as Nicole on the Nickeldeon television show Zoey 101. She left the show for an unknown reason in 2007. Its predicted she got more fan-mail than any other girl on the show because she is the prettiest and most fun character. Fans of Alexa Nikolas usually are not attracted to or are fans of Jamie Lynn Spears because of their completely different characters and style of dress. Now watchers of the show are forced to look at Lola (Victoria Justice) who's character and style of dress has changed slightly since the character Nicole has left the show due to fill her gap. Victoria Justice is pretty but not 100% all the time when she is wearing a terrible outfit or is in the wrong light. Alexa Nikolas is beautiful all the time. Even in a t-shirt and sweats. She is one of the most prettiest and talented girls on tv and would be hard to replace. Bottom Line.
Alexa Nikolas is no longer on Zoey 101! What am I supposed to do, look at Quinn! WTF! Savage Steve Holland and Nickelodeon better get their shit together and get her back or start a Nicole 102 show.
by The Jax April 12, 2007
When a non-jewish male of adult age having no knowledge of the jewish religion is aroused and attracted to Jewish adolescent women that are dressed up and wear pantyhose.
I was at the Palisades Center Mall on Sunday and I seen Phil. I said hello and asked him what brought him to the mall today. He said "Well every Sunday the hot jewish teens come out of the woodwork and come to shop at this mall all dressed up because they just came from temple and find that hot". So I said, "Ok well um aren't you almost 30, Phil?". He replied, "I look but don't touch. Then I remember what I see and go home and screw the brains out of my ugly girlfriend with the lights off".
Phil is such a Jewishophile!
Phil is such a Jewishophile!
by The Jax August 5, 2009