1 definition by Suck My Toledo

In a state in which half of the economy is already based off Lebron James, Toledo is the shining star crowning the Christmas tree of poverty and despair. Although the city has a population nearing 300,000, no more than 6 of its citizens actually want to live in Toledo, and the rest of the population has been held hostage by communist overlords at the University of Toledo since a coup de tat in 2002. The misery of the hostages is so massive, it influences the weather to be gloomy, rainy, and, for lack of better terminology, shitty year round. The terrible weather serves as a natural barrier to prevent any outsiders from coming to save the native Toledans from hostile subjection, making the grave situation even more hopeless. Foreign aid has debated on making a rescue attempt, but when they sat down to discuss the matter, they realized the people of Toledo kinda suck anyway.

The people of Toledo communicate mostly through their battle cries. For those unfamiliar with Toledan battle cries, they are similar to the sound of a thousand fucking car alarms. The most popular cult ritual battle cry begins with the clan elite saying "TOL". After the apex unit begins the chant, his or her grunts respond with "EDO", signaling that they are ready for combat. The best course of action upon hearing this ritual is to respond to the Alpha's signal and attempt to blend in to the underlings.
Person 1: Hey where do you want to go for vacation?

Person 2: Not Toledo
by Suck My Toledo April 16, 2018
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