Stuart Fletcher's definitions

Tit-Wank

<verb><noun> Slang;

1) To rub one's genitals between a pair of breasts to cause orgasm.

2) Offensive slang; An insult.

1) "Oh my god, I am having the uberest orgasm ever due to this extremely nice tit-wank you have bestowed upon my person."

2) "Dave, you silly tit-wank get back here before I burn your gerbil."

by Stuart Fletcher January 18, 2005

The War of 1812

Due to disputes between the United States and Britain over impressment of US Soldiers to the British Navy and the naval blockade by Britain on Napoleonic France aswell as disputes over the Northern Territories in Canada, America declared war on Britain.
During the course of the 3-year war, America won a series of naval battles, although failing to make an impression into British territory on land due to British aggression. The most prominent of American victories being those at York (Toronto) and after the war had ended officially, at the battle of New Orleans. British forces invading America lost the battle of Baltimore and succeeded to burn Washington DC (which was saved by a heavy rainstorm).
The territory Britain did capture was handed back after the war, as were the gains of America...

What a stupid pointless conflict.
And what happened to the blockade on France? It continued! And Britain smashed the French Navy at the Battle of Trafalgar and pummeled Napoleon at Waterloo, with the help of the faithful Prussians. Thanks Germany, we know who our REAL friends are!

Just kidding, thankfully now Anglo-American relations are just peachy.

by Stuart Fletcher November 2, 2004

D.C.

<abbreviation>

1)
Electronics; Direct Current;
Electrical current which flows in one direction in a circuit.

D.C. current is used to power electronic circuits due to many of the components such as diodes, transistors and I.C. (Intergrated Circuit) chips which can only function properly with D.C. current.

2)
Geography; Washington D.C.
District of Columbia

1)
CHILD: "Why does the keyboard have a larger plug than the lamp?"
BOFFIN: "Because that bitch-assed mutha-fuckin' plug got some A.C. to D.C. convertin' to do, and those fat bitch assed components needed to do that need mo' SPACE! That's why."

2)
PILGRIM: "What does the D.C. in Washington D.C. stand for?"
FONT OF ALL KNOWLEDGE: "You travelled 12,542.7651 miles and climbed a 2,782.957611 foot high Himalayan mountain to ask me, the Font of All Knowledge THAT?! It means District of Columbia! Now go!!!"

by Stuart Fletcher February 22, 2005

Penal Column

<noun> Slang;

1) The penis.

"I am male, observe my mondo penal column."

by Stuart Fletcher May 16, 2005

Absolute zero

<n>

1) Science; The temperature at which any molecule will oscillate/vibrate at it's slowest speed.
e.g.:-
-273ºC
-459ºF
0ºK.

2) Slang; A hopeless person.

1) "And so class, we can now see that this material has reached absolute zero. The molecules are at the slowest they'll ever be."

2) "Godfrey is an absolute zero."

by Stuart Fletcher November 7, 2004

Spesh

<noun> Chiefly British Slang

1) To be one of a mentally diminished nature. See: retard

==> Term is a derivative of 'special' as some mentally challenged people are put in special areas of school and/or are known as "special people."

The term is used in a lighthearted sense to people who are not clinically disabled. Merely people who are known for doing absurd or stupid things.

FLETCH: "That fucking Fisheye... He's such an idiot!"
SCOTT: "Yeah he's such a fucking spesh."
FISHEYE: "Huh huh, I'm making a brew, shag yer bird, shag yer bird! Huh huh!"

by Stuart Fletcher April 2, 2005

Bucket

A flabby, loose or overly spacious vagina. Has a complete lack of taughtness and can usually house large objects, possibly large objects being the cause.

"Mrs. Darlington at number 13 has a 'bucket' according to Heratio."

by Stuart Fletcher November 1, 2004