Trying NOT to hit a kangaroo or wallaby whilst driving on a country road in Australia, but the blasted thing may still jump out in front of you. Trust me ... They cause a hell of a lot of damage to your car! This happens mainly at night.
Me: "Man! You can travel along a country road at night without playing a game of Australian Roulette with a roo!"
Tip: Honk your horn every so often to frighten them away from the road.
Another word to describe someone as stupid or dumb. These people generally have nothing important or constructive to say and waste your time and oxygen with stupid comments or blow by blow details about shit you don't care about. It gets better! You have never met them before in your life!
Them: blah, blah, blah, blah, "My dog this", blah, blah, blah, "yesterday that."
Me: Why should I care?? You're still talking crap! My god! What a unit!
A dumbfuck customer who asks stupid questions and wants to prank the waiter at a restaurant. They then wonder why the waiter looks at them as if they were fucked in the head.... The moral of the story... THE WAITER'S JOB IS TO BE RESPECTED!
Customer Tool 1: "Can you please see if you have diabeteic dessert?" (giggling to other douche bag tools at their table)
Customer Tool 2: Do you have a camera you can lend us?
Customer 3: Do you have a kid's playroom? (At a fine dining restaurant where the restaurant is not there for a child's entertainment- a park is across the road)
Waiter: I have to respect your jobs, so respect mine- BIATCH! Do I look like fuckin' Kodak?
An irritating iPhone user who endlessly tinkers on it. A worst case senario: somebody at a wedding who cuts in front of or hovers behind or puts their wide load arse in the way of a CONTRACTED photographer at a wedding.
Me: "I couldn't get the shot!!! Some iCunt got in the way!!!!" And as a result, photographer panics becuase some iCunt doesn't realise it's their JOB to take the freaking shots ...
A Barista that gets stuck making coffee and desserts for customers. They may get stuck with these tasks for 1/2 an hour and can't get away fast enough. This happens on quite nights at a restauraunt, then SLAM!
Me: Can you take these meals out, please mate?
Nathan: * Gives no response, but continues making coffee at a million miles an hour. (No response is not an issue). He is being a Barista Bitch.