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Optical_Epilepsy's definitions

hyperbodick

Somebody who takes an exaggeration, a figure of speech, or a hyperbole literally as a pathetic attempt to make you sound stupid

It's ironic though how when ever somebody tries to be one, after they rebuttal, all you can hear are crickets chirping
Normal Person: It's raining cats and dogs outside!

Hyperbodick: Animals can't fall from the sky you fucking moron! This faggot bitch cunt seriously thinks cats and dogs can fall from the sky, what a retard!

Normal Person: (pulls out pistol)
by Optical_Epilepsy December 10, 2011
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doomsday question

A question that cannot be answered without lying, or changing the subject to avoid an undesired effect.

This is commonly done in an argument or disagreement when they think doing so will make a point. It will only make a point to gullible morons.
Normal Person: The kicker is important in a football game.

Douchebag: Is he as important as the quarterback? (doomsday question)

Normal Person: (shakes head and sighs) What do you think...

Douchebag: I asked you not me

Normal Person: (depressed) No...

Douchebag: Exactly so you were wrong. The quarterback is much more important.

Normal Person: Did I say the kicker was more important than the quarterback?

Douchebag: So the kicker is more important? (doomsday question #2)
by Optical_Epilepsy July 4, 2011
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foreign language

Used to replace a noun, when you could not be any less clueless about this noun. You have no idea whatsoever how it works, behaves, functions, where it lives, and this list can go on infinitely.
Male High School Dropout: Dang ur hot

Female College Graduate With Long Hair, A Beautiful Face Small Waist, Huge Titties, And A Phat PHAT Booty: "Especially my boobs" (exposes breasts which have basic algebra signs tatooed on them)

Male High School Dropout: "D4ts uhh 4n 14gw1dge" (foreign language)

Female College Graduate With Long Hair, A Beautiful Face Small Waist, Huge Titties, And A Phat PHAT Booty: "Your not smart enough to deserve any of this, go back to school moron."
by Optical_Epilepsy April 20, 2011
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conjumplaining

The act of jumping to conclusions so your right to complain is justified.

This tactic is typically involves deflective arguing and ignoring what the other person has to say.

People who use this tactic will also typically have very low respect for the person they are talking to, as well as having no sense of honor
Man: I wish women would stop being so selfish

Women: If your gay that's ok, nobody likes ugly, pathetic, desperate faggots anyway

Man: I'm so tired of women always conjumplaining

Women: If your gonna hit me, do it right now so I can beat you up, or file assault charges if you win the fight

Man: (censored for graphic violence)
by Optical_Epilepsy May 14, 2011
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pseudo-phylogynist

A man who is good at pretending to respect women, when in reality he thinks she is pointless unless she will have sex. These guys make it difficult for men who foolishly think respecting women is the way to her heart.

Unfortunately, this is the type of person women are attracted to the most

Not to be confused with jerk or misogynist as these men don't pretend to respect women, and tend to glamorize the concept of disrespecting women.

This is the leading cause of gold diggers, materialism and misandry
Any musician who brags about how much money he has or will spend on a girl is likely a pseudo-phylogynist because it's not necessary to do so if all you want is a relationship

The song Whatever U Like by T.I. is a great example
by Optical_Epilepsy April 3, 2011
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cops

The people we hate when we are breaking the law, but the people we love when the wrong people go crazy.
I hate cops when I get pulled over, but love cops when im at the mall and some crazy guy is killing people with an AK-47
by Optical_Epilepsy May 13, 2011
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readelete

Reading a text, email, or any other type of online message and deleting it without replying

This means that you obviously don't want to have any type of communication with who/whatever sent you the message.

If you question whether somebody is readeleting your messages, stick to the 24 hour reply rule and the 7 day reply rule
Steve: I sent this bitch 15 messages over the last 2 weeks and she ain't replying....

Dan: She's giving your messages the good old readelete, just let it go man
by Optical_Epilepsy September 3, 2010
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