Definitions by Nedd Ludd

massive coronary 

(MASS-iv KORE-ah-nair-ee) noun. a Jewish heart attack

Rose: Oy vey! Sylvia, have you heard?
Sylvia: Nu?
Rose: It's Eugene. G-d forbid! He has had a massive coronary already.
Sylvia: Thank G-d it wasn't a goyish heart attack.
Rose: You're telling me!?
Sylvia: Pooh, pooh, pooh.

massive coronary by Nedd Ludd October 10, 2005

for later

(fore LAY-ter) noun. term for any amount of food wrapped up in foil or plastic wrap with or without a paper plate and given to one by a Jewish Mother for consumption at some point in the future

Jewish Mother: What? You think I'm trying to poison you already!?
Nebbish: No, I loved your kugel. I ate six helpings.
Jewish Mother: It was five but who's counting. Here let me fix you some for later.
Nebbish: That would be lovely. Thank you.

for later by Nedd Ludd October 10, 2005

post post journalism 

(post post ger-nah-liz-em) noun. the situating that occurs when one has the opportunity to watch one’s fatal demise from a position of relative comfort, then having survived the incident one gives an aural as well as visual account of the harrowing situation from a position of relative comfort

Wolf Blitzer: OMG! Look at that plane's fucked up front wheel! How will they ever land it?
other talking head: I don’t know. Let’s watch it all later.
Wolf Blitzer: Now this just in…
Later in Situation Room:
Wolf Blitzer: We now have a CNN exclusive interview with a CNN correspondent who just happened to be on that plane with the fucked up front wheel. Let’s tune in .
survivor/reporter: …So, there we were. We watched our plane going around and around for 3 hours on the tv screens in the backs of the seats in front of us. And we didn’t die in a fiery crash either. OMFG! This is definitely a case of post post journalism.

post post journalism by Nedd Ludd October 10, 2005

diltf 

(dilltff) noun. abbreviation or anagram for 'Dad I'd like to fuck'

Sue: Wow, check out that fine guy over there.
Sally: The one with the kids?
Sue: Whatever. He is definately a diltf.
Sally: You're right.

diltf by Nedd Ludd October 10, 2005

retrowish

(WHRET-row-wish) n. the condition which can arrise if you fail to forward a chain email

Sue: "OMG. The instructions at the end of that stupid chain email said that I had to forward it to 10 people in the next 10 minutes or my wish would be cancelled."
Sally: "How many people did you send it to?"
Sue: "Uh, eight, I think. Now what?"
Sally: "Well then, I guess you will have yourself a retrowish."

retrowish by Nedd Ludd October 10, 2005

p n' p 

(pee-en-PEE) verb. abbreviation for party and play as relating to homosexual men engaging in sexual acts while high on methamphatimine (see p and p and crystal dick)

Tod: "Hey Tim. What are you doing this weekend?"
Tim: "I was invited to Tad's."
Tod: "Oh, that's right! Ted told me he got a teener.
Tim: "Yeah! Now I'll get laid."
Tod: "So, you guys are gonna p n' p huh?"
Tim: "I hope so."

p n' p by Nedd Ludd October 10, 2005

dirty catch 

(DIR-tee katch) n. having your pee test at the methadone clinic come back with narcotics in it resulting in a reduction of one's take home doses

Sue: "For fuck sake Maryann. I thought that you gave me a clean catch in that last Elmer's Glue bottle."
Maryann: "Shit Sue! I'm sorry. What happened?"
Sue: "That bitch at the clinic said I had a dirty catch. Now they are gonna cut back on my take home doses."
Maryann: "Well, you are the one who wanted to get high with me, remember?"

dirty catch by Nedd Ludd October 10, 2005