Monkey's Dad's definitions

The full MTG

Delusional derangement worthy of Marjorie Taylor Greene. Craziness on par with believing that the Sandy Hook massacre was staged, that Trump is a Messiah sent by God to smite the Democratic child-killers lurking under the pizza parlor, and indeed that he "won" the election. To clarify; that Adam Lanza did not kill any children but that Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden regularly do so.

Have you spoken to Lauren recently? She's gone the full MTG.

by Monkey's Dad February 2, 2021

Sadomaskochism

Deriving gratification, sexual or otherwise, from exposing one's naked facial orifices, flirting with the risk to self and others of suffering, pain and death. Refusing to wear a mask in public, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Sadism and Maskochism combined.

Knowing he might be infecting other people, or that he might get infected, he strode barefaced into the crowd, feeling the thrill of public nakedness, thrilled by his sadomaskochism.

by Monkey's Dad June 12, 2020

mentia

The inverse of dementia. A state of mental incline rather than decline. Having not only all one's marbles but too many.

He could remember every almost word he had ever read, could recount conversations verbatim from several decades earlier, knew the names of minor characters, and the actors who had played them, in movies he had never seen. He could remember the name of a person he had met in passing many years ago, while some of his contemporaries searched for the names of their nearest and dearest. The diagnosis was direct: He was suffering from early onset mentia.

by Monkey's Dad July 3, 2023

Erfolgfreude

A strangely-nonexistent German word meaning "Taking pleasure in another person's success", the theoretical opposite of 'schadenfreude' - a word which has long existed in German and has migrated into English, meaning "Taking pleasure in another person's misery and suffering ".

Hearing that his colleague had won the Nobel, Schmidt was overcome with erfolgfreude and immediately called to offer his profound and heartfelt admiration.

by Monkey's Dad February 28, 2020

omniincidence

All things happening at the same time.

An opening and broadening of the concept of coincidence.

It had seemed a coincidence to board the plane and to find, through conversation, that he was seated beside the brother of the musician he was traveling to L.A. to record with. Years later, as the three of them finished their run at the Beacon, they laughed, agreeing that the concerts, the flight, the albums and everything in between were one, an omniincidence, events without sequence.

by Monkey's Dad November 23, 2021

The Center of Our Happiness

In an erotically blessed couple, the woman's clitoris, focus of all devotion, from which emanates such intense energy, joy and transcendent oneness that her lover can think of nothing else. ... Excuse me. What were you saying?

In the middle of the day, apropos of nothing, she suddenly blurted, "the center of our happiness" and he knew exactly what she was craving.

by Monkey's Dad December 14, 2022

Anti-Socialist Behavior

Scorning Bernie for his 'socialist' ideas, then cheering Trump for promising to write everyone a check.

How dare they criticize her anti-socialist behavior?! Bernie wanted to give everyone free healthcare! Because he is Communist! Donald the self-made millionaire is going to send every American some free money, which they can spend any way they want, on beer and bullets, keeping the government out of everyone's life!

by Monkey's Dad March 26, 2020