Monkey's Dad's definitions
She refused to be vaccinated, certain that Bill Gates had engineered the whole pandemic to take over the world. The shot would implant a microchip in her brain. Bill Gates would know where she was at all times, what she bought, the websites she visited, what songs she liked. She had learned this from her i-phone, which was always on, always in her hand. She was a certifiable vaccadoodle and if she perished from Covid, at least Gates would never know.
by Monkey's Dad February 15, 2021
Get the Vaccadoodle mug.Covid Standard Time.
A new Time Zone which took effect in 2020, throwing Easter Standard Time, Pacific Daylight Time and all the rest into a state of irrelevance.
A new Time Zone which took effect in 2020, throwing Easter Standard Time, Pacific Daylight Time and all the rest into a state of irrelevance.
His appointment was Wednesday at 10:15 CST, which meant he might show up on Tuesday or Friday, a week early, two months late, anytime, really, because what is time now? Covid had revealed time as a hoax of some sort, whether perpetrated by the media or the universe he would figure out later, yesterday or never.
by Monkey's Dad July 27, 2022
Get the CST mug.by Monkey's Dad June 5, 2020
Get the silence enables violence mug.Her Majesty / High Maintenance. "Allow me to inform your uppity blonde self that we ain't even got no damn grapefruit juice to splash in your damn Sex on the Beach and same applies to whatever your pet monkey drinkin' too."
by Monkey's Dad November 23, 2022
Get the HM mug.She was so done with lockdown. Everyone was heading for the church and she was going to attend that reviral meeting and praise His name.
by Monkey's Dad May 3, 2020
Get the Reviral Meeting mug.A long-awaited collaboration from the creators of Mad Men and Breaking Bad - Matthew Weiner and Vince Gilligan. Millions of homebound fans, desperate for a new binge, are hoping TV history will be made.
Don Draper sees the writing on the wall - a third of the storefronts on Madison Avenue are vacant. Realizing that in Covid-depressed America there is not much left to advertise, not much to buy and little reason to buy it, he goes in search of Jesse Pinkman, and the temptation of Breaking Mad.
by Monkey's Dad December 27, 2020
Get the Breaking Mad mug.Heather's posts centered around her anxieties, her phobias, her delusional self-image - photos of herself taken today, taken ten years ago, taken when she was born - complimenting herself in a variety of ways, and her friends obliged, from empathy, 'liking', 'sharing', telling her how beautiful she still was, knowing she was a Facebook patient.
by Monkey's Dad April 3, 2020
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