Monkey's Dad's definitions

Quaranteenager

A person coming of age in the coronaviral age, home-schooled, missing out on dating, beer, pot and every other rite of social passage.

Watching "Clueless", "Ladybird" and "Booksmart" while in lockdown, she yearned to experience the geeky teen years which were her birthright and hated-hated-hated being a dorky quaranteenager.

by Monkey's Dad March 28, 2020

negated negation

A prefix which should, but does not, negate the word to which it is attached. While 'mobility' and 'immobility' are opposites, as are 'effective' and 'ineffective', the words 'passivity' and 'impassivity' mean the same thing, as do the words 'flammable' and 'inflammable'.

Tired of being described as passive, he decided to be more impassive. He'd be a man of action, or maybe even inaction. What difference could a negated negation make?

by Monkey's Dad July 25, 2023

rantlers

Multi-pronged offensive weapons projecting from the cranium of a male who has something to say, and say again, and then expound upon, at length and in detail, with increasing volume, until his adversaries, and even those who might under gentler circumstances have agreed with him, are driven toward quieter pastures.

He came out of the theater sharpening his rantlers, so aggrieved by the multitude of sins - factual, artistic, moral, narrative, historic, cultural, - committed by the new Tarantino film - the sheer misdirection, when there had been so much to be made from the basic elements of the story, the irredeemable irrelevance of every central character and most of the secondary characters, wasted plots twists galore, to no advantage, gratuitously altered realities, that interminable shot in the second act which had no place in the mise-en-scene...

by Monkey's Dad September 8, 2019

abstruct

An abstract construct. How the once-real world feels to many, after weeks of social distancing and lockdown.

She knew they were real people on her screen, during the zoom meeting, sorta. The truth was, she saw it as an abstruct, which she hoped no one could tell.

by Monkey's Dad May 24, 2020

Snake Lunch

The lowest state of being a person can attain, far lower than merely becoming 'toast'.

He felt certain that, after the multiple convictions which were looming, the 'leading candidate' would be snake lunch.

by Monkey's Dad November 23, 2023

The Center of Our Happiness

In an erotically blessed couple, the woman's clitoris, focus of all devotion, from which emanates such intense energy, joy and transcendent oneness that her lover can think of nothing else. ... Excuse me. What were you saying?

In the middle of the day, apropos of nothing, she suddenly blurted, "the center of our happiness" and he knew exactly what she was craving.

by Monkey's Dad December 14, 2022

omniincidence

All things happening at the same time.

An opening and broadening of the concept of coincidence.

It had seemed a coincidence to board the plane and to find, through conversation, that he was seated beside the brother of the musician he was traveling to L.A. to record with. Years later, as the three of them finished their run at the Beacon, they laughed, agreeing that the concerts, the flight, the albums and everything in between were one, an omniincidence, events without sequence.

by Monkey's Dad November 23, 2021